


i can't help but want you

by LITOLHAO



Series: war of hearts *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ [2]
Category: TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Arranged Marriage, Child Choi Soobin, Daddy Issues, Everyone Is Gay, First Kiss, Fluff, Gay, Guard! Soobin, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Kai is a magical boy, Light Angst, M/M, Mentions of Myth & Folklore, Minor Choi Jisu | Lia/Hwang Yeji, Mythology References, Pining Choi Yeonjun, Prince! Yeonjun, Royalty, Soft Choi Soobin, Soft Choi Yeonjun, Whipped Choi Soobin, Whipped Choi Yeonjun, Witches
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-06
Updated: 2020-01-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:02:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22083829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LITOLHAO/pseuds/LITOLHAO
Summary: Soobin was just a knight. He wasn’t royalty, he neither had the privilege to dowry or jewels nor to the most precious one of them all— the heart of a prince.Part two of the pining royal AU of (Prince) Yeonjun and (Knight) Soobin.
Relationships: Choi Soobin/Choi Yeonjun
Series: war of hearts *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1574785
Comments: 73
Kudos: 317





	i can't help but want you

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fairyjjunie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fairyjjunie/gifts).



> hi ! this is part two of a royalty au series called 'war of hearts' ,, though it serves as a prequel, it can be read independently ! but i highly encourage reading the first part, if u do, i'll lov u literally forever. <3
> 
> important things to note:  
> \- hyacinths are a flower from apollo's past lover, hyacinthus, who was a very gorgeously sexy prince from sparta. u can read more online, it's my favorite lgbt myth i swear, it's so cute n interesting!
> 
> \- apollo : god of archery/music/dance/truth/prophecy/healing/diseases, the sun + light, poetry, and more. most likely a bisexual in his time.
> 
> \- sheath : the casings for swords
> 
> \- aide : during this time ,, aides were usually knights but generally, their main job is to assist royalty / leaders. they serve as a guide / adviser. they're very important people :> !
> 
> if you've watched the anime 'snow white with the red hair' or akagami no shirayuki-hime ,, prince zen has three aides that train with him and stays by his side almost everywhere.
> 
> \- yeonsoon / heiran are fictional characters that do not reference actual people so u can interpret the way they look! :)

Yeji reminded Yeonjun of those little porcelain dolls his older sister, Yeonsoon kept on the top of her shelves. Pale, red-cheeked, and dressed so intricately that one can stare at it for hours and the details would remain endless and dizzying. Yeji kept silent as she picked flowers from their kingdom’s royal garden, a bouquet of cyclamens that barely held still when it burst from the smallness of her fist. Yeonjun stared at her curiously.

“Junjun?” A lady whom he had not met yet had called him. Yeonjun doesn’t know her name, but he guesses that the strange lady that had been conversing so animatedly with his stepmother, was probably a queen and Yeji’s mother, if the woman’s highly classed robes were anything to go by. Yeonjun frowned though, his tiny features contorting into confusion. He doesn’t recall being introduced to the woman so being called _“Junjun”_ was a bit of an offense and a threat to little Yeonjun.

Yeonjun approached them and when he met their eyes, he blankly responds, “Yes, old stranger?”

The immediate panic was seen in Yeonjun’s stepmother, with what Yeonjun’s deliberate bluntness. The other woman, the ’stranger’, hid her fluster well with only a discerning raise of a brow, as opposed to his reddened stepmother, Heiran. Heiran she rose to her feet and bowed in apology to the other woman. His stepmother turned to him and exasperatedly scolded him, “Yeonjun! Apologize to Queen Jeheon this instant!”

“Sorry Queen Jeheon.” He’s not really sorry.

Jeheon had only stretched a hint of a smile in her aged face and inscrutable expression. “Aunt Jeheon is fine and it’s quite alright Yeonjun dear. You must have been startled when I called you.”

At that, Yeonjun had nodded and Jeheon had continued, her eyes calculating and glimmering with a suspicious glint Yeonjun could neither understand nor decipher. “We wanted to ask you if you would like to play with my Yeji over there. She seems awfully lonely just picking flowers, doesn’t she?”

Now despite the fact that Yeonjun was a bit too blunt for his age, as well a teensy bit manipulative, he wasn’t heartless. Yeji did look a bit lonely and _kinda pathetic_ , in Yeonjun’s opinion. Still, there was something about Aunt Jeheon that Yeonjun didn’t like. Yeonjun had noticed Aunt Jeheon’s eyes weren’t quite like any other woman he had met so far because it was as if she hid something behind those slanted eyes and that enormous hair of hers. He doesn’t know what it was but there was just something inherently strange about the way she looked at Yeonjun and how she feigned her smile, leaving Yeonjun skeptical.

Yeonjun doesn’t know if Heiran took notice of that but she beckoned him to her side and whispered, “If you play with little Yeji over there, I’ll give you some Sakura Mochi.”

The prince’s eyes visibly lit up as he nodded resolutely. Queen Jeheon may be weird but mochi was always worth it. He turned to both of them and vowed solemnly. “I’ll play with Yeji!”

Both the queens had smiled at that and he was about to start running towards Yeji and her strange flower-picking self, but not before he took one last glance at Aunt Jeheon that stared at him back. Her gaze wasn’t as challenging as Yeonjun’s, but she met the prince’s remaining doubt with a calmly cold appraisal that sent shivers down Yeonjun’s spine. There, Yeonjun had a conclusion that “Aunt Jeheon” was probably evil and most likely up to no good.

Yeonjun was so caught up in thinking about all the evil things Aunt Jeheon could do to him and his Sakura Mochi, he hadn’t noticed he was right in front of Yeji. Yeji stared at him and in contrast to her mother, Yeji’s eyes were pure and void of any deception as she silently mouthed the quietest ‘hi’ Yeonjun had ever heard.

“My mom said she’d give me food if I played with you.”

Okay, maybe Yeonjun shouldn’t have said that. He realizes that as soon as Yeji blushed in embarrassment and frowned. Before Yeonjun could apologize for possibly hurting her feelings, Yeji had cut him to it. “I…” Yeji starts quietly, but no longer shy. She didn’t hesitate this time. “I didn’t want to play with you, anyway. You don’t seem nice.”

“What?” Yeonjun scoffs, grunting in tiny. “That’s a really stupid reason, you know.”

“You’re stupid,” Yeji mutters as she continued picking flowers, unfazed.

“Hey!”

.·゜゜· ·゜゜·

Yeji, who was so young but had such daintily dextrous fingers that played piano and picked flowers, and Yeji, who was always so ornately gowned in resplendence with muted yet lavish hues, made small Yeonjun’s young heart confused. Though little Yeonjun still bore the grudge of being called stupid— every time he had said Yeji was fugly, was a time he had lied. Still, he was wary. Wary at how much of a creep her mother was and wary of how in front of everyone, Yeji seemed to look and act closer and closer to a porcelain doll every time she’d visit his castle. Luckily, Yeji deemed Yeonjun as someone trustworthy enough that she didn’t need to play the part of a mechanical ballerina atop and dancing along to the manipulative hums her mother tuned and strung. When it was Yeonjun, Yeji was herself.

When Yeonsoon reads him a fairytale that night, he couldn’t help but wonder if Yeji was his destined princess. It felt a bit weird though because as pretty as Yeji was, Yeonjun didn’t feel exactly in his skin as the role of the dauntless prince. Honestly, in some of the books he had stored in his cabinet, he found himself more in the usually trapped character of the princess. After all, it’s not like his father gave him that much freedom besides roaming around the castle grounds. Not only that but his father always forced him to do things he didn’t like. But, Yeonjun was no princess now, was he?

He jokingly told Yeonsoon that he’d rather be the princess and Yeonsoon held his hands, smiling. _“That’s okay too, Yeonjun.”_

Yeonjun groaned when Yeonsoon peppered kisses all over his small face, whining about how he was already _eight,_ and that he was practically a man at that point. Yeonsoon had only laughed heartily and wished Yeonjun sweet dreams. When Yeonsoon leaves, he sighed, tossing and turning. Is Yeji even a real person? What if she wasn’t? But she acted so differently, could it be that there were two Yejis? No, one annoyingly mean Yeji was enough, Yeonjun thinks. Come to think of it, did he even _like_ her ‘that’ way, just like in those storybooks? Does he?

He doesn’t know how long had passed, nor does he know if he even slept at all that night. 

.·゜゜· ·゜゜·

The next morning came and the prince could be only described as _cranky_. Most likely because he needed more sleep on the pronto rather than being forced to do his daily routine. He absolutely despised the idea that he had to take a bath, eat, then play boring minuscule chess with colored pieces. Yeonjun had rarely ever experienced such frustration in his chest but today was different; the mix of sleep deprivation and feelings of confusion from the previous night pouring heavily into that morning. Yeonjun huffs, teary-eyed while he tried to push away the grappling hands of the handmaidens. At a particularly hard tug on his wrist, Yeonjun had whimpered. The maiden gasped, her eyes wide as let go of her vice-like grip on Yeonjun. Her expression was regretful as she hushed carefully, “I’m sorry, your highness. I shouldn’t have—“

Yeonjun didn’t listen to her apology, cutting the maiden off as he took that chance to swiftly duck under the other maids and run as fast as he could out his room. Cries of his name could be heard from his room, echoing loudly in the hallways. Yeonjun didn’t listen though, he could be scolded by his stepmother, or even worse, his father, but he couldn’t care less, not right now at least. Tears streamed across the small distance of his eyes to his chin and he didn’t bother to wipe them. He just kept running and running, ignoring all the knights and guards that tried to call for him too. He pushed the wooden backdoor that led to the stables and when he checked that no one he knew nor knew him was on sight, he runs to the side of an empty stable. He crouches on the corner and sobs. He was tired of being forced into things he didn’t want to do. He was tired of everyone gripping unto his skin when he refused them. The price hiccups, his eyes burning and nose running. He had felt so hurt and he didn’t even know how to put it into words. 

“Hello?” The soft voice had come from the other side of the wooden stall. Two knocks had followed from that side too.

Yeonjun sniffles. “Who’s there?”

“Um, me?”

Yeonjun hears feet shuffling, and now the source of the voice faces him. A boy, that couldn’t be possibly any older than Yeonjun was, stared at the prince with worry. The first thing he notices is that the boy was differently dressed— with his weirdly loose shirt and ragged pants that pocketed the helms of knives and a small, wooden sword. Yeonjun doesn’t think he’s ever dressed like that. The prince also notices that the boy was much shorter than he was and wondered if he was a five-year-old.

“Go away, kid.” Yeonjun scoffed, fiercely wiping his tears as he tried to conceal his sniffles.

“I am _not_ a kid, I’m seven.”

Yeonjun eyes him from head to toe. The prince takes note of the other boy’s handsome features but he doesn’t say a word. Yeonjun violently pushes away the thought. Ignoring his strangely flustered mind, Yeonjun conceals his growing interest when he thinks about the boy’s words. He’s seven? It couldn’t be, Yeonjun assesses. The boy in front of the prince was the smallest ‘seven’ year-old Yeonjun had ever seen, heck the boy’s polo didn’t even _fit_ him properly.

“You can’t be seven, you’re lying.”

“Am not!” The boy answered petulantly, bending down where he could face Yeonjun.

“Are too!” Yeonjun insisted, “You’re too small to be seven. I would know because I’m eight.”

“Are you? Because you’re crying like you’re three.”

Yeonjun gasps, his cheeks reddening in humiliation. How dare he? The prince didn’t expect the other boy to be so _mean_ and it catches him off guard. Yeonjun huffs, “Shut up!”

The boy sighs as he fishes something out of his ragged pocket and hands it to Yeonjun. “Here.” 

It was a handkerchief, plain and a little bit freckled with ash. Yeonjun was confused. Was the boy giving it to him? Weren’t they just fighting?

“Oh yeah, you seem like royalty. Sorry,” The younger blows on the handkerchief and dusts it off for extra measure. “Here, it’s not dirty, I promise.”

Yeonjun’s hand hesitantly reaches out when he takes it. Wiping his tears, Yeonjun sniffs, embarrassed. The prince doesn’t know what to make out of their interaction. He murmurs a small, “thank you,” to the younger boy.

“Eh, it’s alright. I’m Soobin.” _Soobin,_ Yeonjun tries to test out the name, but it was so silent that Soobin didn’t notice.

“I’m Yeonjun.”

“Oh, like the prince?”

“I am the prince.” Yeonjun raises a brow and he’s a little taken back and surprised at how Soobin doesn’t seem to be that affected by the news.

“Hm.” Soobin makes a small noise of acknowledgment. “Well, I guess I’m just… Soobin the squire?”

“The square?”

“The squire,” Soobin says again, louder.

“Square?” Yeonjun’s still confused, eyes scrunching in perplexity. Was Soobin making a joke or something?

“What is wrong with you.”

“What’s wrong with you? Why are you a square?”

“I’m not a square, it’s _squire_ , stupid. It’s a knight in training!” Soobin groans, tired of being called a _square._

“Oh,” Yeonjun snorts out a giggle, ignoring the way Soobin stares at him. He’s told what a squire was, maybe once, so Yeonjun’s own ignorance makes himself laugh. “Sorry, Soobin the squire.”

Soobin blushes, turning away. “I’ve always been taught that it’s a knight’s morale to forgive, instead of beheading people. I guess I have no other choice but to forgive you then, Yeonjun the prince.”

Yeonjun blinks. “Would you actually behead me?”

Soobin offers him a toothy grin, “Nah, you’re head’s kinda nice.” Soobin takes a step closer to Yeonjun and pats the prince’s blue tresses. Yeonjun doesn’t think anyone has ever ruffled his hair like that and it’s all too soon when the comfort is lost and Soobin pulls away.

“Also, by the way… Since you said you’re the prince, I think I belong to you.”

“What?!” Yeonjun shrieks, baffled by the blunt. By no means, were those words ever said to him, nor was it _normal_ to simply say it out of nowhere, so casually. Yeonjun’s face twisted into shocked confusion.

“Oh well, I don’t exactly know the specifics, but the Marshal always says things about how we belong to the people and the kingdom, but most especially to the royal family, I think. He’s always saying how he belongs to the king and queen. So since you’re the prince, I guess I belong to you in a servant-y kinda way?”

“That’s…” Yeonjun didn’t know what to say. “That’s cool…?”

When Yeonjun sounded bewildered yet cautious, staring at Soobin as if Soobin had two heads. Soobin didn’t say anything after that, settling for a polite smile and Yeonjun couldn’t help but stare at the other’s cheek imprints— _dimples_ , was it? 

“Well, I have to go—“ Soobin stands up, with his hands on his knees for support. When Yeonjun hurriedly tries to give him his handkerchief, Soobin gently pushes the prince’s hand back, beaming. “Oh no it’s okay, you keep that. See you around?” Soobin gives him one last smile before heading back.

It felt like a dream. Yeonjun stares back at the handkerchief Soobin had just given him and feels his hair where Soobin had patted it so kindly, and suddenly, he thinks of Yeji. Soobin was loosely dressed, unlike Yeji, and while Yeji’s eyes were cat-like and piercingly slanted, Soobin’s eyes were sparkling and fuller. Yeonjun feels bad, but not necessarily guilty when he lets himself think about a pretty boy a lot more instead of a pretty girl.

.·゜゜· ·゜゜·

Months bled into years and they were older now. Though Yeonjun was turning seventeen by the dawn of tomorrow, the Hwangs decided to visit earlier by a day. Aunt Jeheon wasn’t that subtle anymore. Yeonjun realizes that by his current age of sixteen.

“Yeonjun, dear? What do you think about marrying Yeji?”

Yeji’s head snaps in her direction. “Mother!”

Jeheon had shrugged unapologetically, her eyes now awaiting Yeonjun’s response. Realizing even his parents’ were on him, Yeonjun couldn’t help but squirm in unease. He hid it well though, with a clearing his throat, when he went for the safest response he knew and practiced endlessly. “I… It would be um, politically advantageous.”

Yeonjun could tell that if his parents weren’t here, Queen Jeheon would have rolled her eyes or stabbed him with a mini fork. Yeonjun prides himself of the big word though— _politically advantageous_ — storing it away for later so he could say it more and perhaps even to Soobin as an attempt to impress him. On the other hand, Jeheon wasn’t all that impressed, the answer being far from what she had expected. “No, dear. I asked what _you_ think. Don’t you think my Yeji here is beautiful? If not for the political nature of your incoming union, would you have taken her with your own accord?”

Yeonjun was right in his earlier years to have suspicions when it came to Aunt, _no,_ Queen Jeheon. He had noticed from the start that Jeheon had questions with only one, correct, singular answer that would back you in a corner and have no other choice but to fall into the trap. Now, it was so evident that the Northern Queen was manipulative and as a mother, was overbearing as well. Yeonjun decided to answer safely and simply, “Yes. Yeji is beautiful. Speaking of which, would you care to accompany me to the royal garden, _milady?_ ”

“Gladly, Prince Yeonjun.” Yeji gleamed with a practiced smile as she takes in Yeonjun’s extended arm into hers. “We’ll be back shortly.”

Their parents had smiled and waved at them, hurriedly whispering how happy they were for their union. It made Yeonjun want to roll his eyes. As soon as they’re both out of sight, Yeji takes out her arm and slaps the back of Yeonjun’s head.

“That was _awful_ , never do that again, God. I almost choked when you pulled the milady shit.” Yeji mumbled bitterly and Yeonjun laughs. Yeji’s petite disposition and her mirrored image of a doll contrasted differently to how she truly was and Yeonjun had never related to that even more. Almost every royal had some kind of day and night switch, given the small chance of being finally let out of their restraints. 

Yeonjun waved his hand dismissively. “Whatever, Yeji. Go pick some flowers or whatever hobo thing you do nowadays.”

“Go to hell, Choi Yeonjun.” Yeji had narrowed her eyes threateningly. Nonetheless, the princess tucks the fabric of her gown beneath her thighs to crouch down anyway and proceed to size up the garden’s flowers. Yeji had become pickier over the years as if each flower she had to pick needed to be perfect; Yeonjun notices that when Yeji no longer nonchalantly picked as much as she could and instead, feel up the petals between her fingertips and chuck out the flowers that were nearly eaten by the brown of decay. Yeonjun never really knew why Yeji had to do that every time she and her mother had visited, so he finally took it upon himself to ask.

“Hey, why do you always pick flowers? Are you like super into them or something?”

Midway into the plucking the cyclamen, Yeji had paused in her movements. Yeji went silent. There was resignation in her eyes because it was then in that question that her eyes spoke of something far deeper, akin to longing and a secretive yearning for only her heart to know. When Yeonjun though she wouldn’t answer, she had said spoken carefully. “They’re for someone.” The way Yeji had said it was almost spoken like a prayer, reverent as it was whispered. “It reminds them that though I visit this kingdom, not once, do I ever stop thinking about them.”

Yeonjun’s heart weighs heavy at Yeji’s unspoken confession, exactly because he understands what longing and ache feels like. He understood what it meant to love someone that wasn’t easy to have. He bends over to pick one too. Instead of picking among their kingdom’s cyclamens, he goes for the wildflower that hid behind them.

_“Why not one of your own?”_

_Why not pick the cyclamen, why not pick the one with petals that unfurled just like yours?_

“There are already plenty of my own. It’s the one that differs that has more meaning. It’s more precious.”

Yeji smiles at that. They were so similar, so silently. “Who’s it for?” She asked curiously. Yeonjun had only stared beyond the flower patch. It was then Yeji had notices that across them, were the stables, where Soobin was in conversation with one of the elder knights. Yeonjun was staring right at her answer and that was when, Yeji knew. 

She laughs light-heartedly, which garnered Yeonjun’s attention. “What’s so funny?”

“Don’t talk to me, gay boy.” She sticks out her tongue.

“I hate you.”

.·゜゜· ·゜゜·

Throughout the years, Soobin and Yeonjun grew closer and that fact alone was clear to everyone living in the palace. Yeonjun had hoped that whatever feelings his eight-year-old heart had kept and harbored, would eventually dissolve with time. Obviously, that hope was crushed and Yeonjun’s poorly made thought process utterly failed as he spent more and more time with Soobin. They grew so close to the point that there were times they slept together in Yeonjun’s bed whenever Yeonjun had nightmares or if Yeonjun heard something weird and thought it was a man-eating snake, even though it was most likely a cat passing through the windows. Soobin though never protested and went along with Yeonjun’s whims no matter how _bullshit_ they sounded at times, holding him close through the nights as if there were really a terrifying man-eating snake.

Yeonjun should feel bad, making Soobin do this when it wasn’t exactly in his job description nor was it even necessary because he knew he was being dramatic. He should feel guilty for it all but whenever Yeonjun wakes up and Soobin is _right there,_ sun-kissed and tranquilly sound asleep, Yeonjun doesn’t feel much regret. It’s not as if Soobin minds either, if the bright smile that appears on his handsome features whenever Yeonjun asks him to stay with him through the night, was anything to go by.

The prince couldn't help it, really. Maybe it’s Yeonjun’s love besotted mind but he felt that Soobin grew more and more handsome as each day passed.

That day, Yeonjun paced across his room anxiously, the wildflower he picked with Yeji was resting in his palm. Should he go visit Soobin? What if he was busy doing knight things? Much more, it didn’t help that Yeonjun’s mind conjured ringing of Yeji’s voice calling him gay. Maybe he shouldn’t give the dumb flower to Soobin. After all, it was only a wildflower. But was it really? Yeonjun recalls the conversation he had with Yeji and thinks again. No, no it wasn’t just a wildflower, he knew that. He remembers exactly why he chose a wildflower and not one of those cyclamens. He knows what that wildflower truly meant and why he wanted to give it to _Soobin_.

With a stronger resolve, Yeonjun wills himself to escape his desires to mope further and walk out his door. In the corridors of his palace, he thinks about how memorized and familiar the route out the door was. To be honest, the only reason why he constantly found himself, time and time again, pushing open on the wooden door only the maids use, was because it always led to where Soobin was. Whether it was in the stables, the garden, the training grounds— that simple door in contrast to the marbled one out front in their castle, was where Yeonjun and Soobin headed to their own world, far away from the prying eyes and expecting murmurs. Each step Yeonjun takes echoes along with his thundering heart. He doesn’t know why he’s slightly trembling at the thought of Soobin. He knows Soobin would never hurt him, so perhaps it’s the thought that once he gives that flower, it was as if Yeonjun was finally admitting to himself that he was Soobin as more than just a knight in training, more than just his aide.

Next thing he knows and Yeonjun’s dazed is broken when he registers that he’s already amongst the grass of palace’s tucked away back garden. Yeonjun sharply inhales and quickly looks around for Soobin. Jitters go through Yeonjun’s body and when he sees no sight of Soobin, he decides it was a bad time. _This was all a mistake_ , he thinks—

“Yeonjun!”

_Ah well, fuck._

Soobin was standing alongside another knight— Beomgyu, who was atop a horse where Soobin held the reigns on. Yeonjun recognizes Beomgyu as one of the other knights in their kingdom’s circle that trained with Soobin. When they both see the prince, Beomgyu says something to Soobin that Yeonjun can’t quite figure out. Whatever it is though, makes Soobin flush and huff, while Beomgyu throws his head back in laughter. Yeonjun doesn’t have time to guess nor think about it when Soobin starts running to him with his dimpled smile and rosy cheeks. 

“My Prince! What brings you here?”

Yeonjun feels his throat dry at the title, as well as his cheeks heating. He doesn’t think he would ever tire of hearing Soobin call him that. As Soobin’s figure grows nearer, Yeonjun suddenly feels self-conscious, subtly dusting off his clothes and slapping the stray hairs that fell to his eyes.

“Uh, I— Yes. Hi.” Yeonjun coughs, _what the hell._ Soobin seems to be unbothered, sweetly and patiently waiting for Yeonjun, like always. Yeonjun breathes deeply. _Here goes nothing._

“I have a gift.”

“For me?” Soobin’s eyes had sparkled so earnestly that it made Yeonjun dig his nails further unto the skin of his palm. Yeonjun’s pretty sure he’s burning red by now. Stupidly, Yeonjun’s thinking of all the _worst_ things that could happen, despite the absurdity. His mind flashes images of Soobin trampling him, his flower, and his heart over with a horse and he almost tears up. Of course, Soobin would _never_ do that, but the thought still scares Yeonjun.

Nonetheless, there was no turning back now since he was already there and now that he had Soobin’s full and undivided attention. Yeonjun shakily exhales, one hand carefully lax for the wildflower, while the other one clenched in apprehension. “Here!”

Soobin blinks. His eyes were on the small floret and Soobin’s heart utterly _melts._ It was a wildflower. With all the care in the world, Soobin had tenderly held the flower and scooped it from Yeonjun’s palm, cradling it with both hands as if it were glass. “Thank you, your highness. It’s an honor.” Soobin whispers in awe, and he had said it so genuinely that Yeonjun almost forgot he had just given him a _flower._ Sweet, sweet Soobin had spoken as if Yeonjun gave him _the key to the kingdom_ and it made Yeonjun’s heart flip. 

“But...” Soobin stared at the wildflower, a sad smile on his face. “Shouldn’t you have given such a lovely flower to your betrothed?”

“Yeji likes women.” Yeonjun blurts out.

Okay maybe that was a _foul_ since Yeonjun never asked nor was he even a hundred percent sure of that fact but he can tell. Yeji definitely likes women. If the way she looked at Yeonjun’s handmaiden was anything to go by. He makes a mental note to ask her later. Strangely, Soobin almost seems relieved but it only lasted for a quick second that Yeonjun can’t be quite sure.

“And what about you, your highness?” Soobin tilted his head in question and Yeonjun’s heart nervously pounds at the inevitable fact that he had to finally tell Soobin about it.

“I—“ Yeonjun gulps, “—Don’t like women?”

It comes out a question rather than a statement but Soobin doesn’t mind. He laughs at Yeonjun’s fumbling instead. “You seem unsure, your highness.”

“No, I’m uh— I… I’m sure!” Yeonjun sputters, a shy blush rushing to his cheeks when he returns Soobin question with a murmur. “ _Do you?_ ”

“Have you ever seen me with one?” Soobin snorts.

“No?” Yeonjun’s not sure.

“Then no.” Soobin hums, a playful smile tugging his lips.

“Ah.” Yeonjun nods, a weak laugh wheezing out of his lungs. “Nice nice.” _Oh my god, I hate myself, I hate myself, I hate myself, I hate myself—_

Soobin’s lets out a breathy chuckle at Yeonjun’s mortified expression. “Cute.”

Yeonjun flushes deeply, spluttering for words he can’t seem to find and the guard even had to cover his mouth with the back of his palm to keep himself from laughing harder. God, Yeonjun just _had_ to be the most adorable person ever, didn’t he? The adoring twinkle in Soobin’s eyes never left even as Yeonjun hit him with a rag, huffing. If anything, Soobin grew even fonder.

Later that night, when Soobin teases him about it again and affectionately bids Yeonjun goodnight, Yeonjun only sticks his tongue out, the sound of Soobin’s echoing laughter drifting off slowly. Yeonjun thinks about everything for the nth time. Coming out, plus the wildflower. Oh god, the _wildflower_. Sure, Soobin treated the wildflower like it _was_ the key to the kingdom or something but it wasn't and the humility of it made Yeonjun’s nerves set alight, in a terrifying flame when he thinks about how Soobin already had a different key— the one to his heart.

All he had to do was open it.

.·゜゜· ·゜゜·

The day broke into cottoned clouds of white, its vast home stretching into lapis. It was Yeonjun’s birthday and it seemed that even the sky celebrated, its thin swirls, unfolding like bursts of feathers along with the sun’s golden sheets. 

“Prince Yeonjun?” Soobin quietly calls and Yeonjun doesn’t have half the mind to form a coherent response, unknowingly burying his face beneath the covers. Yeonjun stirs in his sleep, his mind still sunken in the haze of his dreams when Soobin excitedly, but gently shakes him awake. 

“Yeonjun-ah…” Soobin sing-songs and that’s where half-asleep Yeonjun abruptly realizes that the deep voice calling him to awaken was none other than _Soobin._

“Soobin—?” Yeonjun groggily croaks, rubbing his face into his palms. 

_Am I still dreaming?_

When Yeonjun’s blurred morning vision slowly comes into pieces, his squinted eyes blink curiously back at Soobin. “Soobin? What are you doing here—“

Yeonjun’s eyes trail to the bouquet that was in Soobin’s hands. Bursting with vivid hues, were the overflow of several minuscule flowers, its bearings more than its stem could hold. A bouquet of hyacinths. Yeonjun’s favorite flower. The prince knew it wasn’t their kingdom’s, the majority of them, being only found outside the border. That was one of the reasons why Soobin brought him there in the first place and the thought of Soobin going all the way, out of town, just for this, just for _him,_ made his heart wail in so much _want_ and so much _love_. 

“I’m sorry I can’t give much. I wish I could though, I swear!” Soobin flushes, his fingers unconsciously gripping the stems harder. Yeonjun’s chest tightens violently, the strong longing he’s always kept for Soobin striking his heart to bits. Yeonjun can’t breathe. Soobin, who was unaware of Yeonjun’s tight chest, extends his hand, along with the bouquet to Yeonjun and smiles. “Happy birthday, my Prince.”

_Don’t you fucking cry, don’t cry, don’t you dare—_

Before Yeonjun could stop it, he was hiccuping out a cry as tears streamed down his cheeks. An intense wave of emotions gushed forth from his heart into a downpour in his eyes. Yeonjun was sobbing when Soobin’s eyes widened in panic, his hands loosening their grip on the hyacinths. 

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry! Yeonjun— My Prince, I— I’ll— uh keep them away…?” Soobin’s deep voice of worry hits Yeonjun with guilt and point-blank _embarrassment_ like a thousand bricks. 

He feels too much all at once. 

Yeonjun’s voice goes hoarse as he speaks. “No! God, it’s not the flowers, _I love them_.” 

_I love you._

That seems to give Soobin a breath of relief but the guard’s expression morphs into confusion and he slowly asks, as if afraid that Yeonjun, _his_ precious Yeonjun, would break. Soobin tentatively sits on the side of the bed, in front of where Yeonjun sat up. Soobin doesn’t know what to do but when his eyes trail to Yeonjun’s hand. he reaches out to take it into his own. They sit in silence for a while as Yeonjun lets Soobin stroke his hand and intertwine their fingers. _I love him,_ Yeonjun thinks, feeling absolutely weakened by Soobin’s warm hold on his hands. 

“Then… Why are crying, my Prince?”

“It’s nothing, I’m being ridiculous.” Yeonjun sniffles, out of breath. He tugs the cuff of Soobin’s long sleeve as he carefully took the flowers from Soobin’s hand and placing them into his bedside. 

Hand still on the hem of Soobin’s sleeve, Yeonjun motions him to move closer with a little shyness in his eyes. Yeonjun curses his height most of the time but he curses it the most at this very moment. He knows he can’t just _pull_ Soobin, because then the guard would have to bend down to accommodate Yeonjun’s shortness. Instead, Yeonjun gets on his knees while remaining on the bed and inches closer, wasting no time in hugging Soobin, the latter on Yeonjun’s chest. Yeonjun whispers, “Thank you, Soobin.”

When Yeonjun’s about to let go, to his surprise, Soobin hugs him tighter, one hand curling on Yeonjun’s lower body, causing Yeonjun to stumble right into Soobin’s lap. Yeonjun coughs loudly, flushing under Soobin and the sudden reversal of positions. When Yeonjun’s about to apologize endlessly, Soobin’s hand reaches up to card through Yeonjun’s hair, and that’s when Yeonjun realizes that the bastard did it on _purpose,_ how dare he! 

“You just can’t stand me being a little taller than you, even on my birthday.” Yeonjun huffs out a breath and Soobin laughs, the sound reverberating through the strings of Yeonjun’s heart.

Yeonjun’s confused but he’s not complaining, basking in Soobin’s warmth. Yeonjun held him tighter as well as if they were both afraid to let each other go at that moment. Yeonjun drew patterns into Soobin’s calloused hands where his hands had found themselves in once more. They stay in silence for a little more, their touch serving a thousand volumes, accompanied by the Yeonjun’s trumpeted heartbeats of loud song. Yeonjun, who was so far caught up in the overwhelming warmth of the moment, that he presses a soft kiss to Soobin’s hair. Soobin doesn’t stop. Soobin continues stroking Yeonjun’s hair, occasionally brushing the tips of his fingers against the outer shells of Yeonjun’s ears while Yeonjun resists how the intimate action makes him downright _tremble_.

Soobin holds their hands tighter and as an answer, the hand that went through Yeonjun’s cerulean locks turns Yeonjun’s head, where Soobin’s hand slides toward to cup Yeonjun’s jaw. Gingerly, Soobin presses a light kiss to Yeonjun’s cheek. Yeonjun had reddened to the point he thought he burned his own face, the gracefully tender touch only lingered for only a moment but it was enough to set Yeonjun aflame. His heart felt like it was about to bolt right out of his chest Yeonjun’s disbelief rendered him speechless, _is this a bro thing or, wait please let this not a bro thing I beg of you—_

“You really are something else, Prince Yeonjun.” Soobin laughs breathlessly, adoring in his tone, in his eyes. It snaps Yeonjun out of his clusterfuck thoughts and he could do nothing except watch Soobin’s smile turn somber when he says, “I’m only a servant that belongs to you, I don’t think I deserve this much from a prince.”

This much, _Yeonjun’s touch, Yeonjun’s time, his heart, his love._

“Soobin-ah.” Yeonjun sighs, incredulous. Soobin may not know the entirety of his heart yet but if only he knew that Yeonjun would give up the world for him if only he knew that— _“I think… I belong to you more than you belong to me.”_

As soon as the words escape past his lips in an accidental, serendipitous, unintended, and unspoken confession, Yeonjun’s stomach drop in a terrifyingly cold regret. _I wasn’t supposed to say that and he wasn’t supposed to hear that! That is the stupidest thing I’ve ever said to him and now Soobin will never ever talk to me because I’m stupid and I think he’s getting the hint that I’m in love with him or something, wait I think am in love with him. I hate myself, literally even Apollo wasn’t this gay—_

“I’m yours, my Prince.” Soobin smiles and he presses a soft kiss to Yeonjun’s lips ever so softly that Yeonjun could almost think that it was apart of some fever dream. One thing that kept him from thinking it was a dream was the warmth it had left. The warmth of it, the warmth of everything, Soobin’s skin, his hands, his words, his smile, his lips, thaws the terrifying feelings Yeonjun kept deep in his heart. _I’m yours,_ the simple words engraved itself in Yeonjun’s veins, in Yeonjun’s bones. It was a promise, a vow, that Soobin was his and they belonged to each other. It was an echo of a benediction that Soobin would never leave him for as long as he lived and for Yeonjun, that as more than enough.

_I love you._

The words were unspoken but their souls heard it clearly.

Yeonjun is in love. He finally accepts that fact as his first kiss is taken by the day he turns seventeen.

.·゜゜· ·゜゜·

With Yeonjun twenty and Soobin nineteen, neither of them forgot what happened three years ago. If anything, they grew even closer and intimacy had become second nature to them, prompting more and more kisses as time went by. Back then, Yeji indeed, turned out to be a huge lesbian when Yeonjun asked but when Yeonjun was about to reveal his own sexuality, Yeji had stopped him, saying she already knew.

Yeji had practically looked the same as they were when they were seventeen, except for the fact that her features were more defined and that her cheeks were thinner. It had framed her so well that she looked even more graceful than before. She had crafted her rehearsed elegance to perfection at this point. It had only worn off as soon as she was alone with Yeonjun, when there wasn’t anyone she knew she’d have to put a mask on. Yeonjun changed minimally. He wore circular glasses now because he thought the frames amplified his eyes, which were a strong point of his, he thinks. Yeonjun also thought it made him look cuter. When he told Yeji this, she laughed at his face and mocked him. _Whatever, fuck Yeji,_ Yeonjun reassures to himself.

At least the person that actually mattered in Yeonjun’s heart thought it was adorable. 

_‘So you believed him?’_ Yeji asked and Yeonjun nodded without hesitation. Yeji had scoffed, calling Yeonjun his hated yet accurate nickname, ‘gay boy’. Yeonjun had countered quickly, _“You know what, Yeji? You’re the only lesbian that deserves no rights.”_

Speaking of which, Soobin had aged so finely that it left Yeonjun sleepless at most nights. Soobin’s features had grown out so attractively too that there were days Yeonjun had given up and just stared at Soobin, ignoring the way Soobin had asked him if there was something wrong with his face. _Everything,_ Yeonjun had wanted to say. It was far too attractive, far too handsome for a guard-slash-knight. Yeonjun doesn’t know which one Soobin was, though he knows Soobin explained it through a Venn diagram he drew on the ground. Yeonjun didn’t pay attention though, far too entranced by how deep Soobin’s voice had become and how nice it sounded when he said Yeonjun’s name. Yeonjun also took note of Soobin’s hands, large and veined and how—

Okay, Yeonjun was _not_ going there.

Not to mention how Soobin grew _so much taller_ than Yeonjun. Sure he was taller by the time they were seventeen but to grow to _that_ extent, left Yeonjun baffled. Did Soobin eat trees and bamboo juice or something? Yeonjun blinked and all of a sudden, he has to _look up_ to talk to Soobin. Though in the more honest crevices of Yeonjun’s heart, Yeonjun finds it that he doesn’t quite mind their height difference. After all, it was a bit too perfect when they hugged and when Soobin could hold Yeonjun by the waist while Yeonjun could bury his face in Soobin’s hard chest.

Right now they were horse riding. _It’s called horseback riding,_ Soobin would have said. Their horses contrasted in color, with Yeonjun’s white horse, and with Soobin’s black beauty. He remembers when both Soobin and Yeji had laughed at Yeonjun’s donkey-looking horse and how the fact that it was white _really_ exemplified how ‘princely’ Yeonjun was. It didn’t help that for some reason, his horse hated him. Like he _despised_ Yeonjun when the prince would do literally nothing but breathe. His horse liked Soobin though, and Yeonjun couldn’t help it but his eye twitches in annoyance when he thinks about it. Was his horse gay for Soobin too? 

Yeonjun’s white horse wasn’t cooperative either. While Soobin’s had carefully treaded their path as gently as Soobin had reigned him to be, Yeonjun’s horse literally just walked wherever, causing Yeonjun’s head to hit their kingdom’s low trees, his blue hair a nest of small branches and leaves.

Soobin sighed and stopped his horse named Hugo, pulling the reigns on Coochie. Yeah, Yeonjun had named his ugly horse Coochie. Probably why the horse fucking hated Yeonjun. 

Soobin’s hips jostled forward because of the horse and it took every inch of Yeonjun’s being not to think about it. Soobin went closer and the guard patted off the leaves on Yeonjun’s head, pulling ever so gently on Yeonjun’s locks to get the small pricks of the branches out of his hair. In the golden lighting, Yeonjun couldn’t help but stare. Soobin was so attractive in ways Yeonjun had difficulty describing.

From Soobin’s perspective though, Yeonjun was the prettiest person to exist even as Yeonjun’s hair was entangled like a bird’s nest, even, _no_ — _especially_ as Yeonjun pouted and huffed. There was always something with the way Yeonjun pouted that Soobin felt the need to take care of him and kiss the pout off his lips. Right now though, he settles for just the ‘taking care’ portion and plucks off the final stick in Yeonjun’s hair with a huge grin.

“There.”

Yeonjun grunts, turning away to avoid Soobin’s eyes. “You could have just told me.”

“If you let go on Coochie, you would have fallen off.”

Yeonjun couldn’t help but snort when Soobin says ‘coochie’. 

“I know why you’re laughing, you literal child.”

“It’s funny!”

Yeonjun childishly sticks out his tongue at Soobin and the guard rolls his eyes. Soobin should’ve known right from the start, that his defenses would be abruptly shattered when Yeonjun starts laughing at his own clownery. Soobin feels his breath run out of his chest when he hears the echoing of Yeonjun’s laugh. Ethereal, it was. Unearthly, were Yeonjun’s sun-kissed skin and rivered locks that were doused golden, beneath the summer’s winds and peach trees. 

_I love him._

The words, however, were lost among the winds of that midsummer day; left in the forests of unspoken songs, for the words were only meant to be sung in Soobin’s heart, where the beat was only for his, and for _his love_ to hear.

.·゜゜· ·゜゜·

The days that followed suit were days that Soobin and Yeonjun feel like the world was theirs, and theirs only to hold. They never spoke blatantly about the nature of their relationship. They were still best friends, they always would be, but lovers! They held each other like one, they spoke like one, and maybe they were. But in a kingdom with its darkened politics, in a palace with eyes and ears within its walls, how could they be?

But they knew and felt that they loved each other so, and against the world, that alone, was enough.

Times like these were more than enough, really. Whenever Yeonjun and Soobin would have their free days, they would often go out of their kingdom’s borders and watch the sunrise. It was a known fact and tradition of theirs for many years. Today though, Soobin was too tired from his training so they both settled for spending time in the kingdom’s garden, among the wildflowers. Ever since that day when Yeonjun was seventeen, Yeonjun had grown more wildflowers and more hyacinths instead of their kingdom’s symbolic cyclamens and the garden has never looked any more vibrant and alive.

Right now, Yeonjun was weaving a flower crown for Soobin, whereas Soobin was cleaning his weapons. It had become a habit of his and Yeonjun found it both endearing and threatening at the same time, two emotions he often felt towards Soobin. Yeonjun was humming quietly as he twisted the stems of the flowers. When he reaches out to pluck another flower, he notices movement among the flowers, rustling the patch. 

When he looks closer, Yeonjun gasps, a menacing amber glinting back from the unmistakable trademark of scales. A snake, a _fucking snake,_ the one thing Yeonjun is utterly terrified of. In an instant, Yeonjun yells, propelling himself back to where Soobin was sitting. The guard had drops his weapons in surprise when Yeonjun suddenly jumped in his lap. Soobin flushed and sputtered but before he could question it, he notices the tremble in Yeonjun’s body.

Yeonjun then whimpers quietly and that’s when an alarm rang through Soobin’s thoughts. “Yeonjun? What’s wrong—“

Following where Yeonjun had his eyes focused on, Soobin had finally understood. The snake hissed, tail swatting the flowers, its beaded eyes on show. Soobin knew how scared Yeonjun was of snakes, considering how the prince would scream if so much a _worm_ got close to him. Soobin assessed it carefully and soundlessly, he places his finger to his lips, motioning Yeonjun to keep silent. 

_“Don’t make a sound.”_ Soobin mouthed. Yeonjun nodded and unknowingly moved closer to him in Soobin’s lap. When Yeonjun makes a move to look at it, Soobin quietly tuts. Soobin then guides Yeonjun’s head into his chest where his eyes couldn’t reach the garden patch. “Don’t look at it either.” Soobin murmurs into the shell of Yeonjun’s ear and Yeonjun follows diligently, pressing his eyes shut.

“It’s okay, it won’t hurt you. I’m here.” Soobin whispered into Yeonjun’s ear, placing his hand comfortingly into the small of Yeonjun’s back, patting it gently in reassurance.

The snake stood still and Soobin noiselessly moves to grab the nearest pebble, cautiously maneuvering his way as not to jostle Yeonjun, who was still in his lap. He throws it in their opposite direction, hoping the snake would slither away. When it doesn’t move, Soobin almost groans in frustration.

To their luck, Soobin catches sight of a familiar knight passing through the outdoor hall, just a few feet away from the garden. Soobin whistles in a futile attempt so he decides to grab another pebble and directly aim it at the knight.

“Taehyun!”

At that, the knight squawked in his place and rubbed his arm where the pebble had harshly hit. _Overdramatic ass,_ Soobin scoffs to himself. When the knight whips his head to their direction, about to screech again, Soobin hushes him, a finger to his lips. Taehyun blinks and Soobin’s already regretting his decisions when Taehyun saunters to them, his eyes wide in realization.

_“Is that… the prince?”_ Taehyun mouths and Soobin’s tempted to throw a rock at him this time. However, they need an uninjured and unharmed Taehyun for help so Soobin gives him a forced grin and nods, violently pointing to the snake in their midst.

Taehyun’s eyes dart to the snake and he gasps. In understanding, he picks up Soobin’s sword, along with its sheath.

“My sword, really?”

“I’m not using mine, Gretchen’s high maintenance. And, you threw a rock at me so this means we’re even.” Taehyun dangles the sword’s sheath, using the casing for the snake to wrap itself into. He’d use the actual sword instead of the case but the snake might poison Taehyun and kill him if he tried. Tentatively, Taehyun nudges the snake with the edge of Soobin’s sheath and digs it under the creature’s belly. Surprisingly, the snake allows it and even coils itself into the case. 

Soobin is _so_ going to wash that. Taehyun slowly lifts the sheath and heads back, probably to throw the snake into the deep ends of the forest. Before doing so, Taehyun sends him Soobin a grin and a thumbs up in support as he scurries out of their sight.

“Is it.. Is it gone?” Yeonjun whispers under his breath.

_No,_ Soobin almost said, not wanting to exactly let go just yet, but he wasn’t selfish for god’s sake. The thought of it though, almost saying ‘no’ for his own benefit made him feel _horrible._ He attempts at a small smile and tells Yeonjun soothingly, “Yeah, it is. You’re okay now.”

“Oh thank god—“ Yeonjun exhales a breath he had been holding but when he looks up, his breath hitches and he’s breathless all over again. Soobin was so close to him that in this distance, all Yeonjun had to do was lean and they could k— 

Yeonjun’s lets out a squeak, “I am _so_ sorry, I should get off now—“

Soobin grips his waist and holds it tighter, keeping Yeonjun in place. Both their eyes are wide and it seems that even Soobin himself is surprised. Yeonjun gapes, his cheeks flushed at the act.

Yeonjun’s cheeks burn, “Wha—“

“T-The… The, um. Snake could come back.” Soobin answers lamely. _What the hell am I talking about?_ Taehyun was always thorough and the latter made sure of it, so the likelihood of the same snake coming back was unadulterated _bullshit_.

“Oh.” Yeonjun blinks. “Were you afraid, too?”

_No, what the fuck._ Soobin had trained his entire life to the point he had to stab a boar and takedown a whole bear, _snakes,_ would never be able to hold a candle to that experience.

“Yeah um. Sure.” The lie lets out faster than Soobin could have the right mind to stop it.

“Oh do you... Do you mind?” Yeonjun asked, still quite unsure of how Soobin felt with him. On his lap.

“No, um. Not at all,” Soobin weakly laughs. Yeonjun’s heart was pounding so loudly that he was afraid Soobin would hear it. The prince couldn’t believe what was happening, his stomach unfurling heat and twisting into knotted messes. Never did he imagine that his day would end up in Soobin’s lap. Though a bit awkward at first since this was something he was yet to get used to, but he wasn’t complaining— he was actually really comfortable and Soobin seemed to _like_ it? Dear lord, Yeonjun hopes he isn’t mistaken. 

“Oh, who was this for?” Soobin quickly shifts the topic, picking up Yeonjun’s half made flower crown into his hands.

“ _You_ ,” Yeonjun mumbles, barely above a whisper. And oh god he was so _adorable_ that Soobin felt his heart constrict, ready to jump out of his chest to be served in a silver platter for Yeonjun. 

“It’s not finished, though.” Yeonjun tried to snatch it away from Soobin, but Soobin held it higher until Yeonjun gave up squirming and let his hands flail to Soobin’s chest. _Aw baby,_ Soobin coos, his cheeks hurting from smiling too much. The prince huffs out a pout but Soobin laughs, endeared. “I’m wearing it anyway.”

Yeonjun sputters, resorting to poking deeply Soobin’s side where the guard had jerked away and yelped. “Hey!”

“That’s what you get!” Yeonjun snorts, reaching for the flower crown once more. ”Now give it back!”

“No way!” 

Yeonjun desperately grabs at the flower crown, making them both stumble to the ground, laughing to themselves. The air bubbled in mirth, cheeks rosed pink. Yeonjun had fallen off Soobin’s lap as he lay on the grass. He looks up to Soobin and his dimpled laughter that he loved so much and Yeonjun breathes. Yeonjun has always found himself breathless but moments like these where he had the chance to fully take in Soobin’s being, his essence, he breathes. He breathes because he loves, because Soobin makes him feel loved. It was a profound sensation where Yeonjun feels so light as if a weight had been swooped right off his chest. He felt so tranquil when he forgot he was a prince and Soobin, a guard and so peaceful in the illusion that their hearts were the only thing that mattered.

As they lay on the ground, with Soobin eventually pulling Yeonjun close to his chest, another snake had watched them closely. 

This time though, it came in the form of a queen.

·゜゜· ·゜゜·

“More tea?” Heiran politely asked, as she notions Yeonsoon for her to pour the tea for Jeheon. When Jeheon only nods instead of offering her cup, even Queen Heiran and Yeji were surprised. Yeonsoon resists the urge to choke Jeheon and hides her murderous thoughts behind a kind smile and reaching out to get Jeheon’s cup for her.

_Brat,_ Yeonsoon had thought. Was it that hard to give the damn china cup? When Yeonsoon fills her cup with tea and stretches over the table for her to place the teacup back, she notices Jeheon’s brows were furrowed in concentration. 

“Heiran…” Jeheon muttered, her hard gaze fixated on the sight below her. Both queens and princesses were out in the patio that oversees the kingdom’s main garden, where Soobin and Yeonjun were resting on each other among the grassed fields. Jeheon hid a sneer itching to come up her features with feigned curiosity. “Who is that boy?” 

At that, Yeji looked at her mother in surprise. Yeonsoon’s brow raised. What was Jeheon up to this time? Yeonsoon asked to herself, not quite trusting whatever intentions Jeheon held. After all, if Yeonjun had his doubts about Jeheon when he was eight, what more with Yeonsoon when she was fourteen?

Heiran casually shrugged. “That’s Yeonjun’s unofficial aide, I think.” Heiran turns to Yeonsoon for affirmation, “Soobin, was it?”

Yeonsoon nods but her eyes were trained on Jeheon. Jeheon was expecting more from Heiran, that she didn’t notice how Yeonsoon internally took her apart with every detail in her movement. 

Jeheon raised her brow, continuing to conceal her true intentions behind what seems to be genuine curiosity. “Unofficial?”

“He was never appointed by Yeonjun’s father but since they were practically attached at the hip since they were children, he naturally became so, without anyone’s word,” Heiran answered, a hint of a smile in her features. Never blatantly, did she show how fond she truly was of the king’s children, especially Yeonjun. As distant as they were due to her disposition as only the second wife, as only the ‘stepmother’, Yeonjun and Yeonsoon kept a good relationship with her throughout the years.

“Why do you ask, Aunt Jeheon?” Yeonsoon stirred her miniature spoon into the fluid of her tea, her eyes subtly yet challengingly meeting Jeheon’s.

For a second, an agitated glint flashed through Jeheon’s eyes but it quickly faded the moment the queen smiled. 

“I just find it strange— a knight of lower-class being awfully close to a prince. I’ve never seen anything quite like it, really.” Jeheon murmurs into her cup, sighing. Her tone stays flat but the air that shifted around them didn’t go unnoticed by Yeji, Heiran, and Yeonsoon when she continued. “If I were him, I’d know my place.”

·゜゜· ·゜゜·

Yeonsoon was an ethereal entity. Her presence in the palace as the elegant scholar garnered respect and adoration, as it should. Even the title of ‘princess’ didn’t seem fit enough for someone like Yeonsoon. Diplomatic, cunning, and intelligent in ways her father was not, and powerful in ways men will never be able to achieve because what she did, what she achieved could only be done by a woman, not by a patriarch.

As bright as Yeonsoon was, she was also kind-hearted in means not a lot could see. Such as now. As Yeonsoon headed toward the knights’ training grounds with her thinly silk gown that flowed behind her, every knight had bowed and greeted. She was beautiful and constantly fawned over, but she was too respectable that one cannot only mention her beauty and nothing else. It would be blasphemy. She steps into the wooded area where Soobin was most likely training and true enough, she sees him in her sight.

“Soobin!” Yeonsoon called and even Soobin had seemed surprised by her sudden visit. Soobin tucks away his sword and walks toward Yeonsoon’s direction, bowing when they were at a conversational distance.

“Princess.” Soobin politely started and Yeonsoon almost lets out a snort. One time. Yeonsoon had unintentionally heard a conversation between Soobin and Yeonjun, and though it was mostly hushed and their voices were only at a volume they could hear, Soobin’s ‘my Prince’ was clear to her. Yeonsoon had smiled at the time and closed the room to Yeonjun’s door for them.

Yeonsoon decides to get straight to the point. “Soobin, how would you like to be Yeonjun’s aide?”

Soobin tilts his head in confusion. “Aren’t I already…?” 

“No, dear. An official aide, not just a knight in training. An official aide accompanies and stays by the prince practically every hour of the day, making sure they train very well and not fuck up any paperwork or local and diplomatic relations.” Yeonsoon gives him a smile, an almost teasing lilt to her voice. “Sounds nice, doesn’t it, Soobin?”

Yeonsoon’s words leave Soobin gaping, speechless. “I—“ _._

“Every hour of every day.” Yeonsoon sang, nitpicking at the dust that fell to the floral embroidery in her chest. She looks up and meets Soobin’s conflicted eyes and sighs. Her hand flicks, motioning for Soobin to come closer to her and the latter does, albeit confusedly. She whispers, “If you were his appointed aide then no one would question why you’re always together. You can spend as much time with him as you want, without sneaking out to that weird cliff near the border.”

The tip of Soobin’s ears go red and Yeonsoon throws her head back in laughter. Oh yes, she knew all about those late-night escapades he and Yeonjun went on when they thought everyone else was sleeping. If it worked on everyone else, Yeonsoon of course, was an exception. The princess was more of a nocturnal kind of creature since she always did work better during the night— only needing a few hours of sleep to fully function. It eventually led to her curiosity and soon, the revelation. Plus, it wasn’t as if Yeonjun and Soobin were that quiet either. It didn’t help it either when Yeonjun confides to her about nearly everything, especially with his gay problems and even gayer adventures.

“Wait, how did you know?”

“I know everything?” Yeonsoon chuckles. “Plus, don’t worry about the process. I’m telling everyone _I_ appointed you, so it’s everything is bound to turn out well.”

“O-Oh.” Soobin blinks, flustered. “Thanks—?” Soobin stops himself immediately, correcting it with a more sincere, “Thank you, I mean.”

_Kind of awkward but lovable. I approve Yeonjun,_ Yeonsoon thinks to herself.

“Take care of Yeonjun for me.” Yeonsoon smiles, her tone genuine with a hint of sternness. When Soobin playfully salutes, she lets out a fond, light laugh, and she waves. “See you, Soobinnie-yah.” She turns back and heads out of the humid training grounds, satisfaction bubbling in her chest. Now her brother can rest easy and the murmurs of snakes can hiss itself into silence.

For now, she did what she could for Yeonjun and when the noise dials down, Yeonjun wouldn’t be hurt. At least, that was what she had hoped. In the dead of the night, Yeonsoon breathes in the moonlit winds that flowed through her pearl skin like silk. A voice had taken Yeonsoon out of her daze. 

“Yeonsoon?”

Heiran.

“Mother.” She bowed in respect. After all, Yeonsoon was always grateful that out of all the consorts under her father, Heiran was chosen and Heiran had no such greed nor the vicious ambitions other queens had. Heiran had only done what was asked of her and she played her part diligently so what was there to resent? Who was Yeonsoon to sneer at a stepmother who has been nothing but kind? 

“Where is Yeonjun?” 

“In his study, I think.” Yeonsoon pauses, curious. “Why?”

Heiran looks around before motioning Yeonsoon to come closer. The queen says quietly, sighing, “Tell him to be careful, is all.”

Yeonsoon tenses and she’s about to ask further until Heiran explains. “As you’ve observed, Jeheon doesn’t quite like the idea of Soobin and Yeonjun. I can tell, she feels threatened.”

Anyone could tell, really. Jeheon wasn’t as subtle as she thought she was. Earlier, during their afternoon session of biscuit-eating and tea-drinking, it was clear as day to Yeonsoon how Jeheon looked at them, how she felt about them, but—

“Don’t you feel threatened too, Queen Heiran?” It wasn’t said out of spite. Not even with the inclusion of the queen’s title. Yeonsoon asks this quietly, a genuine curiosity in her eyes. It wasn’t that Heiran showed any signs of being untrustworthy during the years but a marriage between Yeonjun and Yeji meant less competition. It was advantageous. And if Heiran were to have a son, with Yeonjun out of the way, her son would no doubt, be the king. 

“I am only your stepmother. I have no place to be threatened, Yeonsoon.” Heiran says this slowly, her lips quirking into a small smile, humbled. “Now go. Tell your brother what I have told you.” 

When Heiran makes a sign of resignation, Yeonsoon calls out to her. “Mother?” 

“Yes, Yeonsoon?”

In the dark lighting, neither of them could see what kind of expression the other was wearing but Yeonsoon knew a good person when she felt it. She could not see but she had heard and what was there not to trust?

_“Thank you.”_

·゜゜· ·゜゜·

“Yeonsoon?” The door to Yeonsoon’s room creaks open. Yeonjun yawns, clutching the stuffed doll Yeonsoon had given him ages ago to his chest. Yeonsoon almost sees an eight-year-old when Yeonjun rubs his eyes with the ridges of his knuckles. Yeonjun flickers his eyes to the housed candle and papers on Yeonsoon’s desk and his eyes furrow worriedly. “Are you working again?”

“Not this time. I was getting your gift.”

“What… gift? You never gave me one?”

“Oh my stupid brother, I did.” Yeonsoon tuts playfully, sighing.

“What, when?”

A hint of a devious smirk comes gracefully on her features. “It comes with dimples, a cute accent, and it’s tall.”

“Yeonsoon, you didn’t—“ Yeonjun sputters, gawking at her.

“But I did.” Yeonsoon smiles deviously. “He’s now your officially appointed aide.”

“Yeonsoon!” Yeonjun whines. “He’s already my aide, he doesn’t need some fancy, official title—“

“He does.” Yeonsoon cuts in and Yeonjun’s brow scrunches in confusion. No one’s ever questioned his relationship with Soobin nor did they bother with the official aide thing. Tradition or not, Soobin was already by his side and nothing should change that, right? For Yeonsoon to intervene all of a sudden, stirs Yeonjun into a whirlwind of confusion. What was happening?

“I appointed him because I heard from mother that Jeheon doesn’t quite like the idea of you and Soobin. I mean, you _are_ supposedly engaged with Yeji and that whole heart eyes thing with him that went on in the garden threatened her marbles. Him being officially yours— _Yeonjun stop smiling, you big doof, know what I meant_ — it leaves no room for questions as to why you’re always together.”

Yeonjun stays silent. He supposes that they didn’t really hide it as much as before, resulting in even Jeheon suspecting them. A wave of shame goes over Yeonjun and he can’t help but feel that through him, he had put Soobin in danger and that was a thought he would never ever allow to come true. Yeonjun groans, “Can’t you marry Yeji instead— Ouch!”

·゜゜· ·゜゜·

Yeonjun remembers.

_It was the type of argument sons with shit fathers always had. Neglect, pride, arrogance, abuse. Such things were bound to surface at one point or another, bottled up to release into flames at a tipping point._

_His father’s veins bulged, his face a furious red as his hands shook in fury. “It’s an embarrassment to have you as a son.”_

_Though Yeonjun was small and his heart was too small for too much anger, he was livid, shaking just as his father was. No doubt he was scared but at that point, he hated his father so much that he spat, “No one would want you as a father—“_

_Yeonjun was ten when his father had gripped the back of his head and shoved him into the cobblestone._

He has never hated someone to the point he wanted to hurt them but his father changed that. Yeonjun was only ten when he decided that his father would never love him nor would he ever love his father. He was only at that meager age when he also imagined that he had powers and that his father ended up being swallowed up by thousands of snakes. Of course, Yeonjun’s decision of giving up on his father proved to be a wise one since his father was complete shit. Though they naturally fell into some kind of empty yet professional relationship horribly unhealthy for a parent-child relationship, Yeonjun didn’t mind as much as before. After all, he had Yeonsoon, Soobin, Yeji, all the servants who he loved, and even Heiran. They were enough. More than enough, actually.

Back to the present and honestly, the only thing Yeonjun wanted to desperately say was, _what the fuck_. His father interrupted his nightly routine, insisting Yeonjun would take a look at his awaiting ‘gift’ in the west wing.

“My boy. Didn’t you always say you wanted a pool?”

First of all, they weren’t close enough for the king to call him _his boy_ but he always did, which managed to irk Yeonjun every time. Secondly, Yeonjun couldn’t lie. He did beg for a pool.

When he was ten.

He remembers only begging for it twice.

Yeonjun, now nineteen, could only blink at the built pool located on the west wing of their palace. He never really ventured to the west wing, considering how hallow he remembers it being but apparently, his father, decided to build a pool on the empty space. A very heated pool? Yeonjun guesses when he adjusts the collar of his shirt at how hot it was getting. For fuck’s sake, the entire room was fogged and filled with steam.

“Thanks?” Yeonjun winced, a weak smile coming to his face as his father roared a laugh like he was the best person in the world. “Enjoy the pool, son!”

With that, the king left. Technically, it was more of a spring than a pool. I mean, Yeonjun also wanted a pet griffin when he was eight but it’s not like he wanted one now. If he even saw an eagle head on a non-eagle body, he would not hesitate to shoot, _not it, oh no, animal cruelty is wrong_ , he’d shoot _himself_.

Resisting the urge to tell his father that a better birthday gift he’d rather receive was a better father but he has a pool so it’s… fine.

No, it’s not. It’s stupid, it’s the stupidest thing Yeonjun has ever received, his father could have allocated the budget to the growing poverty in their kingdom or built a trade ship but _no,_ his stupidly corrupt capitalist ass decided to give him a _pool._ What was Yeonjun going to do in that pool? Play and swim? _Drown?_

He knew it, he fucking knew his asshole father gave him a pool so he could drown, that hell creature—

“Yeonjun?”

Yeonjun turns and feels his heart jump right out of his chest as he almost faints at the sight. Maybe it’s the heated steam from the pool or maybe it’s because Soobin, dear god, it was _Soobin_ with only a towel wrapped around his waist. Yeonjun dryly swallows, feeling his mouth water at how _built_ Soobin was. That was years worth of knight’s training and holy crap did it pay off. Though it shouldn’t even surprise Yeonjun, considering how hard Soobin’s chest had felt, how strong those arms had wrapped around him but still, Yeonjun’s breath hitches all the same. 

_Don’t stare at his abs, do not stare at the line in his hips either, don’t stare at his thighs, you know what? Stare at his face, wait no that’s even more attractive._

“Hey.”

“H-H—“ _Fuck._ “Hi.”

_You hate this pool, you hate this pool, this pool is anti-poor, this pool dampers the economic growth of the nation, this pool is built by a capitalist, this pool—-_

“A handmaid told me there was a new pool here I should swim in. So I figured why not, right? Oh, I saw your father on the way out but I didn’t say hi because there was too much steam.” Soobin shyly smiles and Yeonjun knew he was done for. What was Soobin even saying? Yeonjun lost track, his eyes struggling not to look below Soobin’s waist.

“Wanna go for a swim?”

“Absolutely,” Yeonjun says almost too quickly. Wow, he’s homosexual _and_ whipped.

Yeonjun doesn’t stare when Soobin dips into the pool. 

That was a lie. 

He totally stares. 

Even from entering the pool, Soobin makes it look like a spectacle, as if telling everyone he’s not just entering, he’s descending, that’s right, _descending_ because he’s ethereal, because he’s too good for this world and for the word ‘entering’.

Yeonjun’s caught up in resisting not to drool at the sight of Soobin’s broad back when he realizes that he had to go in the pool as well. He almost chokes in embarrassment. He had to strip. Yeonjun cries internally, _I’m too insecure for this shit!_

It couldn’t be helped. He reluctantly unbuttoned his polo, sighing. As layers fell to the floor, he couldn’t help but wonder if Soobin stared. Then again, Yeonjun’s hit by waves of his insecurities asking why anyone in their right mind would stare at him, telling Yeonjun he wasn’t attractive enough to be stared at. What’s worse is when he sees his own stomach, flat and devoid of abs. _I hate everyone._

Thank god there was steam throughout the entire room that he didn’t exactly know where Soobin was because his insecurities would howl knowing he was in plain sight. Leaving only his shorts on, he grabs a towel and tentatively dips into the pool.

Soobin had said they were going for a swim but Yeonjun’s poor heart was too attacked due to sudden nude appearance of Soobin’s godly crafted body so Yeonjun settles for sitting on the steps of the pool. Like a loser. Like those three-year-olds incapable of being a proper human.

Soobin must have noticed Yeonjun’s awkward position of just being on the stairs. Yeonjun’s palpitating when he sees Soobin’s figure swim toward him. Yeonjun scurries away from the steps and settles to meet Soobin halfway, waddling through the water. When Soobin emerges from the water, his deliciously broad chest is in sight and his hair is slicked back and every inch of Soobin was dripping like dew, making him glow beneath the moonlight and Yeonjun thinks he’s going to die.

Yeonjun wants to choke, his throat running too dry. He can’t breathe.

“Not coming?” 

_You are not going to think about any other implications to that sentence. You are not—_

“I forgot how to swim.” Yeonjun mumbles, pouting. “Plus, I’m insecure, you asshole. Not everyone has your...—“ Yeonjun splutters and he does a do-over at Soobin’s way too nice body. “—Physique.” Yeonjun chokes out, turning away with light cherry cheeks.

“What do you have to be insecure for, your highness?” Soobin asks lowly and Yeonjun’s too dazed to even register when Soobin steps closer to where he was, rippling the water in between them. It only sinks into him that they were _so_ close when Soobin rests his forehead on Yeonjun’s bare shoulder. Yeonjun swears he’s about to faint when Soobin murmurs into the golden melatonin of Yeonjun’s collarbone. ”You‘re perfect to me. You’ve always been, always will.”

“Wait—!” Yeonjun yelps as soon as Soobin places his large palm against Yeonjun’s hip beneath the water, drawing light patterns into it and pulling Yeonjun forward. Yeonjun’s cheeks now bloom furious red. “Isn’t this a little weird when we’re, you know...”

“Hm?” Soobin hums in faux confusion as he continued his ministrations on Yeonjun’s hip.

“I still... still can’t—“ Yeonjun croaks, his being reduced into a dazed state, distracted by the way Soobin looks at him with lowered eyes, by the way he spoke in an even deeper tone, by how Soobin circles his calloused hand and slides it up his slim waist. “C-Can’t— can’t swim...”

Yeonjun’s breath hitches when he’s met with Soobin’s dark gaze.

_“I’ll teach you.”_

Yeonjun doesn’t remember.

Maybe it was Soobin’s deep hum or the toned perfection that was Soobin’s skin. Maybe it was because Soobin had breathed so closely to his skin that it made Yeonjun shudder. When Yeonjun surges his lips to Soobin’s, the latter catches it almost immediately, kissing him back just as fiercely, a smirk tugging on his lips as if he expected Yeonjun’s outburst. They’ve kissed many times before, the time just like this, where only the sapphic goddesses of night stood watch, where Yeonjun couldn’t help but feel Soobin’s eyes were among the stars behind them. Those were gentler times where neither of them rushed and took their time to peacefully bloom into each other like moonflowers.

But this one—by no means were it like any other kiss they had previously shared. It wasn’t the gentle warmth Yeonjun had felt before, this heat was more all-consuming and it felt like it could swallow him whole. _Soobin, Soobin, Soobin_ , his heart had ached and cried, _I love you so much_ , as his mouth had willingly parted for Soobin to achingly lap into.

From how close they were, Soobin opened his eyes ever so slightly and it was so surreal how unbelievably pretty Yeonjun was. Every detail clicked into him in a second. He’s always been with Yeonjun. It’s always been Yeonjun, but up close seeing the rosy glow in Yeonjun’s cheeks, hearing every sound he had pulled out of Yeonjun, every gasp and mewl, he couldn’t believe Yeonjun was even real. _I love you too much_ , he had desperately chased Yeonjun, eating up the way Yeonjun arched his back when Soobin holds Yeonjun by the waist, stroking the slim curve beneath the water.

At this point, Soobin should have pulled away and accompanied Yeonjun to his room where the prince could soundly sleep but the frantic ache in his chest that longed for Yeonjun over many years made Soobin kiss him even _harder_. Lightheaded and almost dizzying it was, and Yeonjun was sure his lips were swollen and bruised but he didn’t mind because he himself, couldn’t stop either.

Soobin felt his heart weigh as his chest grew heavier. What was he doing, honestly. He was just a knight, he wasn’t royalty, he neither had the privilege to jewels nor to the most important one of them all— _the heart of a prince_. He shouldn’t have so much, he shouldn’t be given so much. _He was only a knight_ , a mantra that rang through the darkest ravine in his thoughts when he lay sleepless and restless at the thought at how much he didn’t deserve Yeonjun, sweet, precious Yeonjun whose heart was always on his golden sleeve. Guilt had always gnawed unto his thoughts like no other, whenever Yeonjun would lean into him or whenever they would be too close for friendship. _I love him but I can’t be with him_ , Soobin’s rationality had screamed at him but his heart, which was always more honest, led him to take every opportunity, every chance he got to hold Yeonjun until such time.

Until such time he had to let go of his prince.

Behind closed doors, they loved each other so passionately yet gently because the reality was too cruel. The reality was the fine distinction between who they were. What they were, not to each other, but to everyone else. Neither of them knew how much had passed, they slowly pulled from each other, lips spit slicked and breaths panting into each other’s mouth where the added steam made it even hotter.

Soobin exhales shakily, dropping his head to Yeonjun’s shoulder as he rasped, “I’m sorry, your highness.” Soobin turns his head and Yeonjun’s knees feel so weak as the prince struggled not to whimper when Soobin licks a stripe to Yeonjun’s neck. Just a touch away from the outer shell of Yeonjun’s ear, Soobin murmurs, devout and so, so shamefully, “I’m so sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I’m always _selfish_. I—“ Soobin flits his tongue to the exterior of Yeonjun’s ear and lightly tugs on the lobe where Yeonjun consequently lets out a strangled moan, high and needy. “I want you to myself even if it’s not possible.”

“What— _Nngh_ … Soobin, ah.” _Fuck_ , Yeonjun couldn’t keep his head straight, mewls unrestrained as Soobin repeats the action, again and again, now lowering near to the area of Yeonjun’s jaw, sucking into the skin and heatedly dragging his tongue on the bite.

_“I’m already yours, dumbass. I’ve… I’ve always been yours.”_ Yeonjun breathes out, his voice high-pitched and unfamiliar even to him and he almost whimpers alone from the sight of Soobin’s eyes, a territorial glint hinting between brown. “Will you…” Soobin purses his pretty lips together and Yeonjun almost combusts. Soobin pleads quietly, “Will you say it again, my Prince?”

“Yours, Soobin.” Yeonjun presses one last kiss, resting his forehead on Soobin’s as he murmured against the edge of Soobin’s lips. _“All of it, all yours.”_

·゜゜· ·゜゜·

“So? What did you see?”

“Well.” The handmaiden awkwardly started, subtly fiddling the hem of her blouse in anxiety. She clears her throat and hopes that by the end of this all, the queen doesn’t behead her. “I— uh. Went out soon.”

“Why?!” Jeheon snaps her gaze to the other. “I told you to stay there until they left!” She hissed.

A week ago when Jeheon decided to extend her stay along with Yeji for a month, the king didn’t miss the chance to boast and gloat about his bearings, especially his heavily spent ones. His ridiculously lavish gift for his only son was no exception. When Jeheon had heard this, she was quick to send her handmaiden out, making sure she would lead Soobin to the springs so the maiden could gauge out everything that would take place. Jeheon had even went so far to make arrangements with the king, to let Soobin enter the hot springs, or pool, whatever the hell it was. The king, of course, had questioned this and all Jeheon told him, ‘I want to check something.’ Having a glimpse at her duplexity, the king had sighed but allowed it.

Jeheon eyes the handmaiden and how unease stiffly flowed into her movements. _Don’t tell me—_

“What were they doing?” Her voice was sharp, cutting into the handmaiden’s trembling nerves.

“They were swimming at first but then... they shared um,” The woman swallowed. “A kiss and then some,” She muttered as an afterthought.

Jeheon scoffed in incredulity. She gawked, as the news sunk through her even deeper, clenching her sharpened nails into the skin of her palm. _She knew it_. She suspected it for so long that those two weren’t _normal_ , that they weren’t what they wanted everyone to believe. And they even managed the gall to try and fool her, the queen. _Preposterous_.

“ _Tell them it happens today._ ”

The handmaiden flinched at the queen’s cutthroat tone but nodded nonetheless. The northern queen breathed deeply as she felt anger and its intensity rush through her veins in a viscously furious pulse.

In truth, Jeheon never cared for Yeonjun but this, this union, this marriage _needed_ to happen. She worked for more than thirteen years easing Yeji into it, years of convincing the king and queen, and years of careful planning. And it was not about to collapse just because of some nameless guard, just because of how selfish Prince Yeonjun was. _No_ , this marriage was going to happen. Yeji would become the queen and then behind the ropes, it will be her that will rule the kingdom, with the support of Heiran and the king, with the resources and money from Yeonjun’s kingdom. _Everything will be hers, no matter what._

This, however, was a posed threat to that work. Jeheon laughed, delirious with red anger. The urge to scream and rip out Yeonjun’s throat came through her thoughts. She won’t let it get away. She won’t. Not after everything she had done to get this far. Fortunately for her, she no longer had the heart to be driven with remorse. After all, it was greed that drove her to position, to her survival. Whatever she had in store, she would do it with an iced resolve, she would do it with not an ounce of guilt in her bones.

In her angered state, she hadn’t noticed her daughter enter, the handmaiden long gone after the queen’s order. Yeji held a breath at the sight. Jeheon was shaking and the nails that dug into the skin of her palm gushed lines of blood into the marbled floor. “Mother? You’re bleeding—“

“Two men!” She spat. Jeheon could no longer keep her rage at bay as she seethes in unadulterated disgust. “In the baths, utterly shameless! Wait until the King hears about it, so we can get rid of that _boy_ —“

“Mother! Get rid of who?”

“That _Soobin_ —“ Jeheon had said it so maliciously that it was as if the name bore a curse. 

Yeji’s eyes widened in shock and as calmly as possible, Yeji insisted. “Soobin? Mother, he’s just Yeonjun’s aide—“

“That’s what they want you to think!”

_She finally found out_. _I’m sorry, Yeonjun,_ Yeji thought. She worries her lip in distress, Yeonjun had to know that Jeheon knew. Still, Yeji attempted to belie the truth, “Mother! You’re being ridiculous.”

“I’m not! The handmaiden said so herself that she found those two in the baths, _kissing_. It’s _despicable_ and unheard of! Yeji dear, you need to understand that this needs to be immediately be taken care of or else this whole marriage will collapse! Our future is at stake!” At the words, at the reminder that it was Jeheon that held Yeji’s future, that would string Yeji along to whatever wicked doings she would do in order to achieve what she wanted, made Yeji sick to the core with repulsion. Having to spend another minute with her mother already felt like drowning but to be married off and have her mother control her even by then, she felt a nerve snap harshly, a thread break within her.

_“Let it collapse then for fuck’s sake! I—“_

Jeheon whips her hand to the Yeji’s cheeks in a rapid motion before Yeji could even flinch. “Don’t you dare say that ever again!” Jeheon screamed, her face red with fury, pupils blown wide in rage. Yeji cries silently when Jeheon grips her chin harshly, the queen’s sharp nails digging deep into her skin. “I am doing this for you, for _our_ future and I will not let a nameless _bitch_ ruin that.”

“Kyeha! Take Yeji to her room, _don’t_ let her out.” 

·゜゜· ·゜゜·

With every drawer out of its cabin, Yeji searched. The door to her room was locked but she knew it wasn’t as heavily guarded. All she needed was something sharp. Throughout the entirety of her life, she was under the strings of her mother, a marionette, so to speak, beaten and bruised but not completely broken enough to stop working. She no longer bats an eye at her mother’s neurotic behavior, so far used to her mother’s voice raised, so far used to the warfare at her own home painted in red. The only thread of sanity that held Yeji together was the fact that she knew someone was always waiting for her, no matter the circumstance. But her damage was already beyond repair. That wasn’t the case for Yeonjun though. She couldn’t let anything bad happen to Yeonjun and Soobin.

Whatever her mother was planning always involved someone getting hurt or even worse. Yeji quickly scans through the set of corsets in the closet, plucking each article piece by piece until it fell to the floor in a scattered mess. She had to get out, she had to warn Yeonjun, she needed to _do something_. Why is it that the times she needed a pin or a needle the most, were times they hid from her sight?

_Wait._

How could she forget?

She hurriedly grabbed the hidden compartment in the drawer and true enough, revealed a set of sharpened pins. She kept that long ago, when her mother brought her to Yeonjun’s castle when she was eight. That time too, she had locked Yeji away until Yeji had to eat for breakfast the next day. She knew that would not be the last time her mother would do such a thing so on their next visit, Yeji had already created a secret compartment in one fo the drawers and hid a set of things to help her escape if the time came.

Who knew that such a time would actually come?

Carrying a pin in between her fingers, she nimbly picks the lock to the door. Just as she had done a thousand times over. When the lock clicks open, Yeji soundlessly moves through the gap, moving the door only by the millimeter so it couldn’t creak in case her mother was still there. Thankfully she wasn’t. But it was also a bad thing because it meant that her doing could already be in action at that very moment.

Yeji huffs a breath, quickly running into the hall and unto Yeonjun’s room. Before she could though, the sound of armor rattling pierced through her nerves. It was a guard.

“Your highness?”

Irritation boils in her veins as she forces a polite smile to the guard. “Mother is out, carrying a last-minute errand. I just need to tell Prince Yeonjun something of utmost importance.”

“But Queen Jeheon had told us not to—“

Yeji blurts, “Please, just this once? I need to speak with the prince!”

Though the guard did seem apologetic, he shook his head. “I’m sorry but Queen Jeheon had strictly ordered us to take you to your room if ever we saw you.”

“But—!”

The door to Yeonsoon’s room opens, the echoed creak resonating through the both of them. Yeonsoon was in her nightgown, cradling a candle in her hands as she took in the scene. “What’s going on here?”

“Princess Yeonsoon.” The guard swiftly bows. “I was telling Princess Yeji that she should be escorted back to her room, due to her mother’s orders.”

Yeonsoon flicked her eyes to the younger and the pleading look in Yeji’s eyes made her turn to the guard. “Let her do whatever she needs to do. I’m sure if Princess Yeji is out at such an hour, it is of vitality, correct?”

“Yes.” Yeji nodded, determined as she begged. “Please, let me speak with Yeonjun, let me speak to my betrothed. It’s—“ Yeji exhales shakily, _Lia, I am so sorry._ “—It’s about our wedding.”

Yeji almost screams in lesbian.

Yeji forces a smile. Yeonsoon raises a brow, she’s never heard a word about marriage this soon because if there truly was to be a wedding, she would be the first one to know. Yeonsoon takes in every bit of discomfort in Yeji’s smile and the subtle way she forced out her words and Yeonsoon supposes she can play along. If she needed an explanation, she could always ask Yeji for one later. After all, Yeji _could_ use some help.

“Oh?” Yeonsoon quirks a brow and she clasps her hands together. “That is quite urgent, yes! Quickly, fetch Yeonjun from his chambers. Hurry!”

The guard sputters but when Yeonsoon gives him an assertive look, he leaves with a rushed bow anyway, scurrying to Yeonjun’s room. Yeonsoon turns to Yeji with her arms crossed. “It’s not really about the wedding, is it?”

“I—“ Yeji gulps. “No. It’s my mother, I’m afraid she might do something terrible to Soobin. I— I don’t know what it is but she was talking about getting _rid_ of him and I felt so scared because I don’t want anything to happen to them and—“

“Yeji...” Yeonsoon starts carefully. “Breathe. Don’t fret, dear. We’ll find Soobin, okay? I’ll do what I can here while you and Yeonjun can find him. Would that be alright?”

Yeji releases the breath she was holding, “That would be great! Oh my god, _thank you._ ”

Yeonsoon replies with a smile and just in time comes in the guard with Yeonjun sleepily trailing behind. Groggily, Yeonjun groans. “Yeonsoon? Yeji? What are you both doing up so late?”

“Yeonjun—“ Yeji blurts out in impatient haste but she regrets it as soon as she notices the guard eyeing them with suspicion. Yeji mustered up every ounce of self-control in her pores not to even wince in unease as she sauntered to Yeonjun’s side, linking her arm with his. With practiced grace, she exclaims. “Yeonjun dearest, I have urgent news on our wedding!”

“Ew, our _what_ —“

Yeji pinches Yeonjun’s side harshly and the prince lets out a silent scream. She turns to the guard and Yeonsoon, mouthing a ‘t _hank you_ ’ and with a smile, “We’ll get going now!”

“What’s going on—“ Yeonjun’s cut off when he yelps in surprise as Yeji quickly tugs him to his room, closing the door shut.

“Yeonjun, listen to me. I think my mother’s about to do something to _bad_ Soobin. I heard she was getting rid of him but I don’t know how. Whatever it is, we have to find him _now_.”

Yeonjun’s eyes widened. A cold ice washes through Yeonjun’s nerves, the pit of his stomach hollowing into a dreadful drop of unease. _No._ Yeonjun’s breath barely clutches to his lungs.

_“Let’s go.”_ Breathlessly, he drags Yeji out of the room and _runs_. Runs to through the ever-familiar corridors, unlit and pitch black but he knew the way anyway, skips the steps to the stairs where Yeji quickly trailed behind to keep up with his pace, and he runs to the wooden door outback where it led to Soobin’s quarters. His heart was beating a thousand miles while his chest weighed heavily with fear.

Yeonjun understands Queen Jeheon would despise the idea of him and Soobin but not to the extent of hurting _Soobin_. The thought alone was awful and Yeonjun feels his nerves run cold in fear and suddenly, he can’t breathe.

He couldn’t even the stomach the thought of Soobin getting hurt and for the implication to be close to _murder_ , Yeonjun was scared out of his mind, his thoughts flashing various worst-case scenarios that worsened the grip of terror on his pounding heart. _Please, not Soobin, not him!_

There were guards that stood watch, a flaming torch by their side. Yeonjun and Yeji were halted but Yeonjun couldn’t hear, nor could he possibly have the mind to pay them heed. In his haste, he ignores the guard and rushes inside. The gate to the knights quarters swings open and Yeonjun sprints to the fourth door to the left, where Soobin’s room was located. _Please be there, please be there, I’m begging you—_ When Yeonjun hastily twists the knob and pushes open the door, he’s met with the sight of a vacant bed, the sheets unruffled and unused. His heart drops.

Soobin wasn’t there.

_He was gone._

.·゜゜· ·゜゜·

“Come again? Soobin is _what_ —?” Soobin’s standard-bearer, Namjoon, blinks in shock.

“He’s _missing_ ,” Yeji emphasizes, frustration wrinkling her eyes. “Have none of you seen him all night?”

“No, we couldn’t have. It ended up being a false alarm but we got sudden word that there was a fire spreading around town, people brawling and all that.” Namjoon sighed.

“From who?”

“Queen Jeheon.”

_“Fuck!”_ Yeji hisses out the curse, groaning in irritation.

Yeonjun anxiously paces the grounds, thinking of ways of _how can I find him,_ running through his mind in an endless mantra. _I need to find him, I need to save him, I need to help him, please I hope he’s okay._ Yeonjun’s eyes sting with oncoming tears. would never forgive himself if Soobin was hurt because he felt that at the end of the day, it would be connected to him and the inevitable fact that he was a prince. It would be the fact that he involved with Soobin too much that people like Jeheon saw the latter as a threat. God, Yeonjun feels _terrible_.

“Okay. There is absolutely _no point_ in going around circles, all we know is that my stupid bitchass mom is the one behind all of this so listen up.” Yeji motions everyone to gather around. her finger drumming against the oakwood table. “Let’s think about it. If my mother wanted someone gone, wouldn’t she do it far from the kingdom? I mean it makes sense, right? Why would you kill someone in broad daylight, in plain sight? If she wanted Soobin dead yet as not to _seem_ like it was her doing, why do it here when there’s a higher risk she could be caught? Which means Soobin must be out!”

Everyone stares at her.

“Yes, he is indeed… out.” Taehyun mumbles, still confused. He turns to Beomgyu and whispers, “Did you understand anything she said?”

Beomgyu looks equally apologetic when he shrugs hesitantly. “A little bit?”

“I meant he must be around the border!” Yeonsoon snaps and a collectively drawn out ‘oh’ rings throughout the room.

“The border,” Yeonjun murmurs but his eyes immediately go wide at the realization. “The border! The border has a bunch of isolated places fit. There’s a cliff thing going on but also a bunch of forests and go even farther, there’s a river that leads to a waterfall.” Yeonjun bites his bottom lip in worry.

The room goes silent, dread permeating the room in a cold fright, the tension so thick that it was suffocating. In the disquiet, the door swings open, cutting the tension like a knife and all eyes are on the small figure that stood in the threshold.

A boy with auburn curled hair and twinkling eyes scan the room, a wide smile coming up to his expression. “Hi, I’m Kai.”

“Is anyone else seeing the kid or am I just stressed?” Yeonjun rubs his temples, exasperated.

“I called him.” Taehyun clarifies.

“I’m good at finding things!” Kai smiles.

Beomgyu bobs his head in agreement. “He’s good at finding things.”

Yeji’s eye twitches. “Well, we’re finding people, _a person_ , not things.”

“He’s good at that too! Aren’t you, Hyuka?” Taehyun pipes up and Kai nods, smiling. The former then continues to explain, “He was raised by a couple of witches. He probably has some voodoo magic thing that can help.”

_“Witches exist?”_

“Moving on!” Hyuka quickly diverges from the topic when he clears his throat. He turns to Yeonjun and asks, “You’re looking for Soobin, right?”

When Yeonjun nods, still sizing the small boy up in a mixture of disbelief and confusion. Kai doesn’t seem to notice though, unaware and innocent of Yeonjun’s apprehension. Kai went on, “By any chance, would you possibly have something tied to him like a strand of hair?”

_Hair?_ No, he did not, because he never even thought he would need hair that isn’t his. Though he loves Soobin, Yeonjun isn’t oddly creepy enough to just have a strand of hair just casually laying around in case of emergencies or life-threatening situations. Yeonjun turns to Beomgyu and asks. “Beomgyu, do you have Soobin’s hair?”

“No...?” Beomgyu looks mortified, almost offended. “Why would _I_ have _that_?”

“I don’t know man,” Taehyun pats his back in comfort. “You _are_ kinda weird, at times.”

“Hey!” Beomgyu sulks, frowning.

Would clothes count? Yeonjun wonders. No, it probably wouldn’t since it had to be connected to Soobin and his blood makeup or something like that. Wait. Other than hair or blood itself which Yeonjun’s pretty sure he doesn’t keep any bottle of it around, that leaves—

“Does um,” Yeonjun mumbles quietly as he blushed furiously. “Does saliva count?”

“Oh my god, Yeonjun!” Yeji gawks in incredulity. “Is this seriously why my mother wanted to kill Soobin? Because you decided to make out in god knows where?”

_“Well if you put it that way!”_

Hyuka sighs. “It can’t be helped. Your Highness, if you will.”

With a flick of a finger, trailed featherlike fumes that quickly dissipated into a tiny plate that rested in the witch’s palm. When Hyuka holds out to Yeonjun, Yeonjun squirms in unease but takes it anyway. He still can’t comprehend the fact that he’s faced with a real-life witch nor can he comprehend the fact that the said witch summons up a tiny plate for him to spit on. When everyone looks at him expectantly, he stiffly turns around.

Yeji groans. “Really, Yeonjun? Just spit on the damn thing!”

“He’s a literal child, I tell you,” Yeonsoon tuts.

Yeonjun ignores them. He winces but he spits on the disc anyway, wiping the corner of his mouth with his sleeve as he gave it to Hyuka.

Hyuka accepts it gladly and looks at it with wonder and sparkles in his eyes, what the _fuck_ — “Thank you, Prince Yeonjun! This is more than enough, actually.”

“Yeah, that’s a lot.”

“I can practically smell the Soobin.”

“That is _so_ weird.” Taehyun shudders.

Yeonjun shrieks. _“Can we not talk about this!”_

Beomgyu and Taehyun were holding back a laugh while Yeonjun groans. Yeji pats his head in a half-hearted attempt at sympathy. Yeonjun glares at her but says no more. Hyuka carefully places the disc on top of the table, where with another flick of a finger, appears a whole set of equipment, housing differently colored, variantly textured bottles, along with transparent tubes connected to each other and upheld by steel. Beomgyu and Taehyun rush to the witch’s side to ogle at the instruments, giggling when they see some of the things in the bottle mirror their movements and stare at them too. Namjoon’s eye twitch but those two were unstoppable so he says nothing and leans against the wall.

Minutes and moments had passed and where Hyuka works, testing out different adjustments, Yeonsoon and Yeji were conversing silently, occasionally looking at Yeonjun’s way as Yeonjun sits against the wall, holding his knees to his chest in deep thought.

Namjoon sighs. “Beomgyu, Taehyun! Go tell the other guards to start the search and tell them to start near the border. Go.”

The two salute and comply, quickly going for the door. Namjoon sits to where Yeonjun was crouched down and Yeonjun can’t help but think of all those years ago, when Soobin did the same, when they first met. “So…” Namjoon starts, cautious. “You and Soobin, huh?”

“Oh um. Yeah,” Yeonjun weakly laughs. Yeonjun’s only been introduced a few times but he knows Namjoon was the main standard-bearer of the knights’ circle; Soobin _did_ talk about him a lot. Namjoon practically raised Soobin and all the other squires that now stood proudly as knights. Yeonjun feels he shouldn’t have appeared so pathetically in front of Soobin’s father figure but thankfully, Namjoon doesn’t seem to mind.

“He talks about you a lot, you know.”

Yeonjun’s eyes flicker to Namjoon, lighting up in surprise. “Really?”

“I don’t think if he’s even aware of it but yeah! Almost all the time, really. It gets a little annoying but he just seems so _happy_ when he talks about you so I just let it.” Namjoon looks at Yeonjun, who was looking down, mouth gaping as of he couldn’t believe it. The knight shakes his head, continuing, “You know those things he buys for you every time he goes out on missions? Oh— the pin you’re wearing right now!”

Yeonjun moves to grasp the brooch Soobin had given him not too long ago. During that time, Soobin made him close his eyes so when they opened, the brooch would be there, secured and tied. Yeonjun remembers kissing him to oblivion. The memory makes him almost choke, as a fiery sensation began to burn through his eyes, tears slipping past. Namjoon laughs, recalling the fond memory as he stares at the blue brooch on Yeonjun’s jacket. “Yeah, I helped him pick that one out. I swear, even the lady was getting impatient ‘cause he was taking too long. He couldn’t decide if he wanted the one that matched your hair or the one that matched your eyes.”

“He ended up choosing the blue one because I told him the brown one looked like a bug, I mean— _no offense_ to your eye color.”

Yeonjun snorts, wiping the tears from his cheeks with a small smile. “It’s alright. I like this one a lot.”.

“And—“ Hyuka holds up a vial, stirring in a few more dewdrops of widow tears until he releases a breath of relief. “Done!”

“Let’s head to the stables.” Namjoon nods to Yeonsoon and as each of them piled out of the room, Yeonjun looks at the pin once more. “Thank you, Namjoon.”

Namjoon gives him a grin in response.

They leave for the stables where the horses are awakened to their dismay. Hyuka however, jerks the vial, the liquid pouring out into the grass. When Yeji’s about to question him, the liquid dissipates quickly when a small flame sprouts from the ground, its center glowing amidst the cackling violet.

“A wisp....” Yeonsoon gasps.

“Not a lot of people know this but there are good wisps, you know? The blue ones twist up your fate and make you lose yourself on purpose but if you summon a purple one, it does the opposite. Instead of making you lost, it helps you find what you need.”

As Yeonjun stares at the erratic small bulb of fire, he can’t help but pray silently to it. _Let me find him, please._

“Can I step on it?”

“Yeji!”

.·゜゜· ·゜゜·

“Hey. He’s going to be okay.” Yeonsoon soothes beside him, gently reaching for Yeonjun’s hand. Yeonjun gives her a half-hearted smile in thanks, hoping it was enough to convince her. At that, they wave on the reigns, their horses trailing behind Namjoon’s as they followed the wisp. Through the palace’s forests and into their town’s narrow cobblestone roads, Yeonjun only looked ahead. Though unrealistic, Yeonjun really hoped Soobin was somewhere around here but when the wisp goes along the same route Soobin and he usually took when they went out to the border, his stomach drops.

Yeonjun’s fear grows when the wisp doesn’t stop short even as they’ve reached the forests right before the border. It could only mean that Soobin was either in the farther part in their kingdom’s boundaries where it was more dangerous. That or even worse, far beyond the border and in lands Yeonjun was unfamiliar with. The wisp swims through the air and it leads them to the deeper part in the forest, the trees seemingly more menacing as it grew bigger in size, blocking out the moonlight with its thickly natured leaves.

“Stop.”

Yeonjun’s heart jumps and he almost breathes a sigh of relief when they were faced with nothing except a river where the wisp stopped short of. The wisp this time, wasn’t as erratic as it initially was, its calm disposition and mellow flame swaying lightly as if it were watching the river stream as if it were telling them something.

“Is Soobin… _here?_ ” Yeonjun ends up sounding desperate and frantic as he looked around.

Hyuka scans the area as well, frowning. “Well, he has to be.”

“The hell is that?” Namjoon points at the giant brown sack that was slowly sliding through the stream.

It was so ugly that Yeonjun only sighed. “Don’t know, don’t care, and I don’t wanna touch it.”

Yeji holds out her palm, her eyes further scrutinizing the brown sack. She gasps when it twitched the slightest bit. “Wait it moved.”

“It _what?_ ”

“It moved again!” Yeji exclaims as the sack jerked with much more force this time.

“Oh for hell’s sake, it’s Soobin!” Yeonsoon yells, hurriedly chasing after the floating brown sack of ugliness.

“Oh no!” Yeonjun cries, running as well, feeling himself tremble in worry. _Please be alive._

To their luck, there was a boulder in the middle of a stream where the potato sack hit, coming to a halt against the flow of water. Namjoon dips himself into the river, which was surprisingly shallow as she treads through the stream. When he reaches the ugly sack, he carefully pulls it by the hem and back to the ground where Yeonjun ran up to. Hurriedly untying the knotted ropes that held the sack together, Yeonjun wretches the mouth open and almost lets a sob of relief. Namjoon helps him remove the godforsaken sack, with Soobin’s head cradled in Yeonjun’s lap. When Namjoon straightens Soobin’s body, he flickers his eyes to Yeonjun tangling his fingers into Soobin’s hair, flattening it out gently, and he smiles to himself. If only Soobin knew, how much Yeonjun truly loved him.

“Is he alive?” Yeji pants and Namjoon reaches for the pulse point in Soobin’s wrist. For a few beats of silence, the air was heavy and anticipating but Namjoon exhaled in relief, easing their nerves.

“Yeah, he is.”

“Your highnesses!” Their heads turn and comes running up Beomgyu and Taehyun, a whole group of knights behind them with two men handcuffed. “We found the suspects.”

“That was fast,” Namjoon whistles, proudly patting them both in the back.

“They were arm wrestling, it really wasn’t that hard to catch them.”

Yeonsoon groans. “Is it just me or is everything about this murder awfully stupid?”

“Mother’s just horrible at trying to kill people, I guess.” Yeji shrugs.

Yeonjun laughs, his hand sliding to cup Soobin’s cheek. He frowns, worrying his lip when he sees that there was a small bruise.

“Here, let me.” Hyuka plops down unto the grass. He jostles the contents if his satchel and he pulls out ointment and another small vial, similar to the one they just had. The younger places a pea-sized amount of ointment into the afflicted area and instantly, the bruise’s color dissipates and fades into Soobin’s skin as if it was never there. Closing the lid, he reaches out for the vial and uncorks it, spilling the liquid into Soobin’s mouth.

_Shouldn’t he be more careful?_

“Wait—!”

As if sensing his thoughts, Hyuka shook his head. “Don’t worry. What’s important is that it reaches his throat one way or another. He’ll wake up in a few.”

Yeonjun nods in understanding. Witches were pretty cool, he knows that now. “Thank you,” Yeonjun bows to which Hyuka returns with his ever-present smile.

When Hyuka said that Soobin was going to wake up in a few, Yeonjun should have comprehended that as ‘almost immediately’. He really was alive, Yeonjun vows he was going to pray to every god he knew and thank them. Soobin groans quietly, stirring in his sleep. Yeonjun’s breath is on hold. “Soobin?”

Soobin flutters his eyelids and when he sees Yeonjun, a faint smile pulls on his lips. He croaks, “Hi.”

“Hi.” Yeonjun lets his tears run loose this time, grinning widely in relief. With his voice barely above a whisper, he asks worriedly, “Are you alright? Did they hurt you?”

“Yeah, I’m...” Soobin coughs, “I’m fine, just some weird thing they made me smell. It was awful. Chloroform? Yeah I think that was it.”

Soobin warmly smiles though, reaching out for Yeonjun’s wrist to place a small kiss on it in reassurance but his movements come to a halt when he hears the other sniffle.

“You crying?” Soobin teases, his voice airy as he lets out a chuckle.

“No?” Yeonjun raises a brow as if he wasn’t bothered, despite his red eyes and obvious dampness of his cheeks.

“You’re such a crybaby, aren’t you, my Prince?” Soobin coos, laughing, his hand resting on Yeonjun’s jaw as his tenderly wiped off a tear with his thumb.

“Shut up! I thought you died!”

“I’ve suffered worse endeavors.” Soobin sits up, sighing. “And really, if they wanted to kill me, they should have stabbed me. I would have survived the fall if they just threw me here.”

When Yeonjun lets out a strangled sound, choking up another sob, Soobin panics. “I was joking! I’m so sorry! Look I’m alive!” Gently, he pulls Yeonjun to close to his heart, where he hopes Yeonjun can hear it beating. “See?”

Yeonjun snorts, a sad smile on his face and Soobin’s chest aches at the expression. Holy shit, Soobin felt _terrible_.

Soobin places a soft peck against Yeonjun’s hair in apology and Yeonjun glares at him through his teary eyes. Realizing the pure intimacy in the action, Yeonjun felt a slight alarm, instantly noticing how silent their surroundings were. No, it wasn’t that he was embarrassed by the act but because he knew that he’d never hear the end of it from Yeji’s part. Yeonjun quickly glances around and sees Yeonsoon from afar. Catching his look, Yeonsoon waved him goodbye as she pushes the rest back to the forest and far from them both, to give them space. Yeonjun mouths a ‘thank you’ to which Yeji flips him off, only to be dragged away by Yeonsoon as well. Really, what would he do without Yeonsoon?

Wordlessly, Yeonjun adjusts himself and his lap, crossing his legs. He pats it and Soobin doesn’t hesitate. As soon as Soobin’s head nestles into Yeonjun’s lap, Yeonjun runs his fingers through the knight’s hair, mirroring an act the latter has done for him millions of times. Yeonjun pats the tresses with both his hands and Soobin closes his eyes, relishing in the prince’s attention. _I should get thrown in the river more often_ , Soobin plans silently.

Even though it would usually be the other way around, with Yeonjun on his lap for Soobin to give all his care and love to while he strokes Yeonjun’s azure hair, Soobin doesn’t quite mind this either. He’ll take what he can get and he’ll do so gratefully. After a few beats of stretched silence, Yeonjun figured now was the best time. As the saying goes, it was now or never. Yeonjun was going to say it and even if it scared the hell out of him, considering it was an unspoken territory that was yet to be ventured.

“Soobin?” Yeonjun calls out in the silence and he almost worries that the younger was already sleeping until Soobin hums in response.

“We… We don’t talk.” Yeonjun sharply takes in a breath, nervous as he clarifies further, “About us. We don’t say much.”

Soobin gets up once more, inching to the Yeonjun’s side as he looks at the prince with something Yeonjun can’t quite decipher. “Yeonjun?”

“Y-Yes?”

“What am I to you, your highness?”

Yeonjun tenses. The question came to him so abruptly that it throws the prince off. That was the first time Soobin’s ever asked him that directly. Everything was left into the negative space and the natural flow that things just happened and that they were satisfied, at least that was what Yeonjun had thought. A sudden pang of guilt hits through him when he realizes Soobin might have not thought the same way he did. Yeonjun thinks that it was only fair that he would finally come clean to his feelings. It was the least of what Soobin deserved.

“You’re everything to me.” Yeonjun swears solemnly but he adds an afterthought, murmuring, “Kind of like a salad? You’re not just one thing, you’re a bunch of things mushed up together.”

“I’m a salad?” Soobin laughs and Yeonjun continues.

“Well, yeah. I mean you’re my best friend, my official aide, my buddy, but you’re also my,” _Oh god help this is so embarrassing to say._ “My lover and most likely the one—“ Yeonjun turns shy, his face practically and he mumbles, _“the one I would Marry?”_ Suddenly, Yeonjun’s voice dies down, leaving only room for his insecurities to crawl in. “O-Only if you want though… It’s fine though if it’s weird to you, I understand—”

“I love you.” Soobin blurts out, resting his forehead against Yeonjun’s and breathes shakily. “Holy shit, I love you so much.”

Already centimeters away, Soobin surges his lips to Yeonjun’s plump ones in haste as if they were miles apart, swallowing the shocked gasp Yeonjun lets out. Soobin feels so much of Yeonjun that he can’t get enough. He can’t even give the prince the air to breathe when he heatedly licks into Yeonjun’s mouth, tilting his head to the side as he kisses his prince deeper. Time felt slower because to them, it didn’t matter. Yeonjun feels light-headed all over again as his breath is literally taken away again and again and _again_. “I love you,” Soobin pants into the outer corner of Yeonjun’s lips, his chest heaving from the absence of air. At this point, even air couldn’t matter. All that did was Yeonjun, Yeonjun, _Yeonjun_.

Yeonjun couldn’t form a coherent thought even if he tried but the words _I love you too_ rested on his tongue, aching to be released. Yeonjun attempts to gasp it out nonetheless, “I—“

Soobin doesn’t even give him a chance as he cuts Yeonjun off, kissing the boy senseless once more as if he was starved. Desperately, he pulls the elder even closer by grasping the back of Yeonjun’s neck for a deeper angle. Soobin nips at the prince’s bottom lip, tugging on the soft flesh. A twinge of sore pain throbbed in Yeonjun’s lips but he doesn’t even notice it. Soobin does though and if he’s being honest, he could stare at it for hours, thinking about how Yeonjun’s lips were more ample, spit-slicked, and glistening red, how it was absurdly, ridiculously pretty.

Now Yeonjun, _his_ Yeonjun, who loves him so greatly and saves him each and every time, offers up the idea he had always forced himself not to imagine. In truth, the thought of it was always ventured by Soobin when he had time to himself, thinking about how he would finally be able to officially call Yeonjun _his_.

The problem was the question, how could he? Soobin thinks back to the sleepless nights that reminded him how different he and Yeonjun were, how there were times he had distanced himself from Yeonjun and how Yeonjun looked so hurt and miserable that it made Soobin just as equally miserable. Those were the times Soobin always thought of Yeonjun and how everything he did, was for the sake of the prince and that he was but only a knight, unworthy and undeserving. But marriage? Much more, coming from the one person he’d die for? How could he even think of letting go of Yeonjun and hurting him in the process? Now, that was a thought he couldn’t bear. Besides, he loved Yeonjun way too much that perhaps even if Yeonjun didn’t offer it up, Soobin would have ended up asking for his hand anyways and the idea of leaving his prince, would be long forgotten.

After all, Yeonjun was his and he belonged to no one else but Yeonjun. For the longest time, especially in front of Yeonjun, Soobin feels his eyes sting. He replays Yeonjun’s words over and over and he feels so overwhelmed, so happy, that Yeonjun loved him as much as he did. Of course, he’d marry Yeonjun, he’d propose to him a million times if he had to. Speaking of which, Yeonjun, who was practically kissed stupid, couldn’t keep up as much as before. Don’t get him wrong, he loved, well, making out with Soobin but it was just that he also loved you know, _breathing_.

“Soo— S-Soobin,” Yeonjun tries to call out to him in between kisses, breathing heavily. “S-Stop—“

In an instant, Soobin pulls away and Yeonjun knows he’s about to apologize when he’s met with his goddamn puppy eyes. Soobin _was_ one to preach about consent beyond everything. Yeonjun however, has a different idea in mind when he shakes his head. “No, just…—” Yeonjun cranes his neck to show the expanse of his skin and his cheeks bursting in flames as he shyly requests, “Here?”

The black in Soobin’s pupils are blown with a possessiveness and want as Soobin’s lips tug into a smirk that Yeonjun almost cries at because _fuck, that’s hot_. Soobin wastes no time in sinking into Yeonjun’s flesh, the area sensitive and hot on his tongue when he sucks a mark into it. Yeonjun lets out a choked cry, grappling for Soobin’s hand as their fingers intertwined. Yeonjun feels so needy, dizzy with a love-struck haze as he whispers out, _“I love you.”_

Soobin’s eyes soften. “I love you too, always will.” Soobin firmly swears and Yeonjun smiles at that. Soobin’s smile, however, falls as he brushes a stray strand of hair away from Yeonjun’s face. Sensually, he leans close into the prince’s ear. “But… Yeonjun?”

Yeonjun gulps at the deep rasp in Soobin’s voice. “Yeah?”

“Say the words buddy and lover in the same sentence again and I’ll throw myself in the river.”

The prince huffs, lightly hitting Soobin’s chest. In their airy laughter, Yeonjun rests his back on the ground, sighing wistfully in relief. Finally, he felt calm. The sky of deep blue imbued with shades of violet swirled as an emerging light slowly rises up the horizon. It was dawn. Yeonjun finally feels the exhaustion wear him down, the lack of sleep making him yawn. He pats his chest for Soobin to lie into. Honestly, Yeonjun did love being a big spoon because it meant he could pull at Soobin’s cheeks, playing with how weirdly elastic it was compared to normal skin. Soobin, to no one’s surprise, complies easily, resting into the prince’s touch and comfort.

Now all that was left was to rest. Expectations, social class, standards, and norms weren’t important as the sun began to slowly unfold and as they held each other tight, hyacinths swaying behind them.

Rest was all they needed and love certainly helped with the tranquility they both deserved.

.·゜゜· ·゜゜·

“What is the meaning of this?!” Jeheon yells as guards tie her hands. She struggles against the restraints, hissing when the guards only grip her skin tighter.

“Hwang Jeheon. You’re under arrest for the attempted murder of Choi Soobin.” Taehyun declares but then he turns to Beomgyu in a hushed whisper for only the other to hear. _“I’ve always wanted to say that!_ ”

“I have done no such thing!” Jeheon screams in protest, pulling away from the tie only to have herself restrained even further when another guard comes as an assist to knot another tie to her wrists.

“The kingdom protects its knight as much as it is protected by them. Our ways aren’t like others, you know?” Beomgyu says, proud but then he leans down to whisper to Jeheon. “Also in a much less sentimental note, you asked Hyuka for chloroform and he can testify that if we run test throughout Soobin’s system with his tree flower leaf magic.”

“It’s just called magic!” Hyuka whines.

“I’ll call it whatever I want!”

Jeheon growls, “I’ll tell the king all about Soobin and Yeonjun—“

Taehyun boops her nose, cutting her off with a sweet smile. “Won’t work either. What witness would you provide? Your handmaid? In comparison to our case where actual sufficient evidence is present, the entirety of the royal knights circle saw Soobin on that potato sack of death, Hyuka made the thing you wanted him, which came with a receipt, _mind you_ , and even Yeji is willing to act out as a witness to your emotionally psychotic outrage. And that isn’t even all of it, is it? If we get that handmaid to talk, a probable embezzlement case can be found from your exchanges and trade in our kingdom. What do you have, Jeheon?”

When Jeheon mutters curses beneath her breath, Soobin adds an afterthought, grumbling. “Plus if you truly wanted to kill me, I said it before and I’ll say it again, you should have shot me or something.”

Jeheon grits her teeth. _To hell with this godforsaken kingdom and the lowlife it feeds._ Feeling everything around her shatter and fall apart, her eyes flashed red and in fury, her vision blacks. Jeheon’s eyes flicker for the gun near the nightstand and the idea grasps the darker crevices in her chest. She violently pushes the guard nearest to her and in the split second where the guard held eye contact with Beomgyu, the latter only raised a brow, a silently instant command to let her go. Desperately, she crawled for the gun steadied on the nightstand and grapples for it against the restraints in her wrists.

“Stay back!” She grits, clenching the grip with her finger quivering against the trigger.

Soobin says nothing and only stalks closer to her, his eyes darkened. “Shoot it.” The look on Jeheon’s face was priceless as her eyes burst wide open in shock. A tremor crept through her arm and her tight hold on the grip loosened ever so slightly. Soobin was having none of that, grasping her hand in a death-like grip as he pulled the gun to his chest, the muzzle digging into his clothes. _“Do it.”_

Jeheon’s chest was heaving, her finger on the trigger stiffened with hysterical fear and rage as she pulls on it. Her eyes clenched shut, her expression twisted and she jerked, expecting a loud shot to ring throughout her ears but nothing came. Her eyes fly open, met with Soobin’s challenging gaze. She pulls the trigger again but when nothing had happened, she gasps, mortified. To her horror and realization, there weren’t any bullets. Her knees fall to the floor in defeat, her eyes blank and void of thought and the usual calculation it held.

In her petrified silence, Beomgyu clears his throat. “Ah, yeah we put that there as a joke. But now that we know you would totally kill us given the chance, plus your charges on consecutive attempted murders, you leave us no other choice but to arrest you.”

“No. Please, I can’t!” Her voice cracks as she pleaded desperately when the guards held her by her arms. Agonized and revolting even _harder_ against the tie in her hands, she lashes out harshly. “Yeji would be supported by _no one._ Yeji would—”

“That’s bullshit.” Taehyun cuts in. “She can literally live either here or in the woods in the back of our castle and be a hundred percent supported. Don’t worry, we’ll feed her berries if she comes by. Now, shoo!”

From afar, the cries of a fallen queen was drowned out, with no one to give their sympathies to. She had finally met her end, dethroned and locked into isolation where she no longer held control of kingdoms and Yeji. Yeji could finally breathe.

.·゜゜· ·゜゜·

“To Yeji and Lia!”

Thinly built glasses of gold and the like clinked through the room, cheers and bubbling laughter permeating the room like a breath of fresh air. True to their word, Yeji came to live in their kingdom. Of course, it raised questions on her own kingdom but Yeji’s father had no trouble letting her loose. After all, Yeji and Jeheon were closely related and to keep Yeji around in her kingdom was nothing short of a disgrace to the king. A shame but not a loss, really. She worked as Yeonsoon’s aide which Yeonsoon tirelessly fought for to her own father. _Why? Her mother is a murderer and a thief,_ the king had said but Yeonsoon stood by it, a sign of challenge and defiance to the king. Nonetheless, when Yeonjun comes by the throne room later on, he finds a defeated look on his father’s face and a smug one on Yeonsoon’s as Yeonsoon sauntered out the halls with a smile.

It all worked out well in the end, where even Yeji’s lover, Lia, coming to the Yeonjun’s kingdom as well as the royal herbalist not long after. Turns out that it was also the perfect timing— with Jeheon gone, their lives in a peaceful order, as well as the fact that Yeji and Lia were both far from their own kingdom where they were known. It was the perfect timing for a wedding.

More specifically, an outdoor wedding because the weather was good too.

“Yeonjun!” Yeji whisper-shouts while motioning to the new dress she changed into. “Do I look okay?! _Tell me_ I look okay.”

“You’re beautiful, Yeji, relax. It’s your personality that’s ugly, not your— _ouch!_ ” Yeonjun whined, rubbing his arm where Yeji had slapped it. Yeonjun grumbled curses to her but Yeji swiftly turns to Soobin, who was right beside Yeonjun and asks worriedly, “Soobin! Do I look okay?”

“Yes, Yeji.” Soobin bows, a honeyed smile painting his expression. “You look gorgeous. I’m sure Lia would love it.”

Yeji tackles him into a hug, kissing his cheek despite Yeonjun’s screeching. She clicks her tongue, Soobin’s hand in hers when she sighs. “Yeonjun doesn’t deserve a sweetheart like you.”

Yeonjun gapes, an incredulous scoff crawling out his throat. He lunges for Yeji’s throat until Soobin holds him back, blocking him from hitting Yeji on her _wedding_ day.

“Can’t hit me!” Yeji taunts, followed by a high pitched laugh as she sticks her tongue out. “I’m married!”

Yeonjun rolls his eyes, flipping her off even if Yeji’s back was already turned, running off to where Lia was at. Soobin stares at Yeonjun’s disgruntled expression and truly, the prince was like an open book. Even as Yeonjun claimed to hate Yeji, his eyes always softened in pride and endearment when he saw Yeji and Lia together.

“More wine?” Soobin asks and Yeonjun pouts, nodding thankfully. “Yes please.”

Soobin presses a light kiss to Yeonjun’s forehead as he made his way to the buffet table. Yeonjun’s eyes trail to Soobin’s backside, enjoying the view. Soobin looked extra good today, he always did but Yeonjun thought that Soobin’s features were always framed best, at least in his opinion, when Soobin’s hair was parted to the side. It was a bit strange but he couldn’t help it. _Dear god, he’s handsome._

“Ow!”

Yeonjun’s pulled from his thirst daze when a small girl trips in front of him, her white dress puffed and dirtied against the grass. Yeonjun crouches to where she was at and held her by the arm, guiding her upwards. “Are you alright, miss?” Yeonjun asks, smiling.

“No…” The girl sniffled, softening out the stains in her dress with teary eyes. “My dress…”

“Oh. Come with me, let’s get it fixed, yeah?” Yeonjun soothes and the girl nods. Taking her hand in between his, he calls out to where Hyuka was sitting. “Hyuka! Do you have a stain remover?”

“ _I am_ the stain remover.” Hyuka proudly says like he’s the world’s best detergent. When Yeonjun gently guides the small girl to Hyuka. Yeonjun rolls his eyes when the witch does a few tricks first with mini fireworks and a minuscule dragons, awing the young girl in wonder before snapping his fingers, removing the stain on her dress as if it was never there. “There you go!”

“Thank you!” She gasps and Hyuka waves at her as she waddles to Yeonjun’s side.

“Got it all out?” Yeonjun asks, even if he knew the answer but the girl nodded, grinning. “That’s good, Miss—?”

“Haeun!” She piped up. “You can just call me Haeun.”

“That’s a beautiful name. I’m just a Yeonjun.” Yeonjun sighs, shaking his head.

“The prince?” She questioned, her head tilting to the side.

Yeonjun smiles, shrugging nonchalantly. “Eh, sure.”

“Yeonjun? I was looking for you—“ Soobin pauses, blinking at the smaller human and in an instant, he pushes the wine glass to Yeonjun’s hands, startling the prince as he bends to Haeun’s eye level. “Who’s this, hm?”

“I’m Haeun.” She says, shyly beaming when she’s faced with Soobin’s gorgeous features, a small blush on her face.

“Hi Haeun, I’m Soobin!” Soobin chuckles and as if on cue, instrumentals began to play in the background. Soobin gasps and he bows, one hand to his chest, the other holding out to little Haeun. “Would you like to dance with me?”

Yeonjun’s eye twitch, his lips pull into a disbelieving smile while unconsciously tapping the wine glass in indignation. _Fine, I’ll play the role of chopped liver._

“I’ll be back, love.” Soobin gleams as he holds Haeun’s small hand in his and Yeonjun waves him off dismissively. _It’s not like he wanted to dance with Soobin first anyway,_ at least that’s what the prince told himself. Though he puffs out a breath in defensiveness, he doesn’t last long. Yeonjun’s eyes are trained on Soobin laughing as he danced around with Haeun, the adorable sight warming his heart. _He’d make a great dad._ The thought makes him blush though because then _he’d_ be a dad too. Yeonjun pretends his heart doesn’t swoon either when Soobin scoops Haeun into his arms and carries her around, booping her nose as she’s transferred into her mother’s arms. When Soobin catches his stare, Yeonjun quickly looks around as if he _wasn’t_ staring, attempting to regain his composure.

“Apologies for the wait, my Prince.” Soobin bows, knowing that it would irk Yeonjun. _I hate him, I swear._ Soobin grins, seeing the deadpan expression on Yeonjun’s face. “I brought you something!”

“Wh—“

Soobin places a chaste kiss on Yeonjun’s cheek while placing the hyacinth neatly on the shell of Yeonjun’s ear. “Your favorite.”

_Fuck, I love him._

“Oh. Thanks, Binnie.” Yeonjun mumbles, tucking the flower stem further into his strands.

Soobin intertwines their fingers together. “Dance with me?”

Yeonjun groans, rolling his eyes like it was the worst inconvenience, even if that was what he truly wanted right from the start. “I’m tired but whatever, let’s do it.”

Soobin, so far used to Yeonjun’s antics and behavior, laughed. “Sorry, I figured you wanted to dance with me first. My bad.” There’s a teasing lilt to Soobin’s voice that makes Yeonjun frown in denial.

“No? What the hell? I literally never even thought of that.” Yeonjun scoffs, with Soobin humming in response. When the music starts again, Soobin slips his arms around Yeonjun’s waist and Yeonjun links his finger behind Soobin’s neck, swaying to the beat.

“Mhm, sure you didn’t.”

“Hate you.” Yeonjun huffs, pouting as he looks up to Soobin’s fond smile. As expected, Soobin kisses the pout on his lips.

_“Love you too, my Prince.”_

**Author's Note:**

> hi again! it would mean the world to me if you left a comment or two and some kudos if you've enjoyed! visit me on twt !
> 
> fun facts !  
> \- 'heiran' means graceful orchid.  
> \- 'jeheon' references an actual korean queen that was so jealous she murdered people. she died lol GDJHASDH
> 
> \- was my entire knowledge on royalty based on the anime 'snow white with the red hair'? yeah.  
> \- though i’m all for murder mystery, i haven’t dabbled much on that genre yet so apologies if ever the last few scenes seem absolutely ridiCULOUS. mind you, it was an intentional kind of ridiculous so hehehe don’t hate it too much <33 ?
> 
> DEDICATED TO MY MAIN : @yeonjunati -- mwaHH i love u wit all my heart ??
> 
> (no longer allowing any reposts of my work btw!! ©LITOLHAO)


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